ping - off kilter quilter

Sorry....meeting with assistant superintendent went VERY well...complete opposite of the meeting with the principal of the school. The gentleman was open and listened to DH (I was note taker again) and shared ideas and whatnot. He said he was going to forward the 3 points that DH made (same ones he tried to make with school principal) with the supervisor of curriculum/guidance and that gentleman would be getting in touch with DH. He also said he would be having a meeting with the school principal. Well.....

assistant superintendent, supervisor of curriculum, and principal met....principal said DH was rude and obnoxious toward him.....uh,,,nope, DH didn't raise his voice, cut him off, talk to him as if he were a child.....DH *did* say that since it didn't seem like anyone was willing to listen, perhaps we needed to bring in a mediator, to which the principal responded with, "there will be no meeting between us with a mediator".....well....after the meeting between those 3 men, they tried to set up a meeting with: me, DH, principal, curriculum supervisor....wait....principal said NO meeting with a mediator, and here they go trying to set one up....ALL DH asked for was an apology from the principal for the rude, unprofessional, inconsiderate way that he had treated DH....every time DH tried to speak, the principal cut him off or talked over him....wth is wrong with this person??

Turns out this is the way the principal treats the teachers within the school as well....SEVERAL of them have asked if I've gotten anywhere with this and when I've given bare information, have said they aren't surprised because this is how he runs every meeting...he doesn't want to hear ANYTHING different from what he specifically wants....he won't let them share ideas or anything....oh, and found out about another bullying incident....started with texting, continued onto school grounds during the school day....teacher went to ask him to join the family in the counselor's office and his response was that it wasn't his problem because it happened outside of school and when it was pointed out that it had continued on school property, he responded by saying he didn't have time to deal with it.....lovely, huh??

SO....the decision has been made that, once this school year is finished, DS will NOT be returning to that school. We have found an online private school that we will be enrolling him in for no less than 2 years, more likely 3 or 4 years....he will complete what he needs and then we will re-visit him going back to public school at the high school level....but, will anticipate him not liking it and coming back to private school....all depends on how he matures and grows and how much he misses that daily interaction

and that's where we are. Because the principal won't apologize, Ken won't sit in on a meeting where he is present, and so no meeting will be happening, apparently. I can totally understand Ken's view, and the principal does NOT present himself the same.....one way when we all went to the same church and he was in our Sunday school, and a totally opposite way when he's sitting behind the desk at the middle school

"off kilter

So sorry all these problems keep rolling along and getting bigger! Sure hope the private schooling will work out. Barbara in FL

I am glad to hear the meeting with the assistant superintendent went well. But, that principal needs to be made to attend a course on "How to treat parents and teachers with respect".

I hope your DS settles in his new school does well.

Thank you for letting us know.

Good luck, Di

"off kilter snipped-for-privacy@somwherequiet.net" wrote > I have been wondering how your meeting at the school administration > building

Sorry....meeting with assistant superintendent went VERY well...complete opposite of the meeting with the principal of the school. The gentleman was open and listened to DH (I was note taker again) and shared ideas and whatnot. He said he was going to forward the 3 points that DH made (same ones he tried to make with school principal) with the supervisor of curriculum/guidance and that gentleman would be getting in touch with DH. He also said he would be having a meeting with the school principal. Well.....

assistant superintendent, supervisor of curriculum, and principal met....principal said DH was rude and obnoxious toward him.....uh,,,nope, DH didn't raise his voice, cut him off, talk to him as if he were a child.....DH *did* say that since it didn't seem like anyone was willing to listen, perhaps we needed to bring in a mediator, to which the principal responded with, "there will be no meeting between us with a mediator".....well....after the meeting between those 3 men, they tried to set up a meeting with: me, DH, principal, curriculum supervisor....wait....principal said NO meeting with a mediator, and here they go trying to set one up....ALL DH asked for was an apology from the principal for the rude, unprofessional, inconsiderate way that he had treated DH....every time DH tried to speak, the principal cut him off or talked over him....wth is wrong with this person??

Turns out this is the way the principal treats the teachers within the school as well....SEVERAL of them have asked if I've gotten anywhere with this and when I've given bare information, have said they aren't surprised because this is how he runs every meeting...he doesn't want to hear ANYTHING different from what he specifically wants....he won't let them share ideas or anything....oh, and found out about another bullying incident....started with texting, continued onto school grounds during the school day....teacher went to ask him to join the family in the counselor's office and his response was that it wasn't his problem because it happened outside of school and when it was pointed out that it had continued on school property, he responded by saying he didn't have time to deal with it.....lovely, huh??

SO....the decision has been made that, once this school year is finished, DS will NOT be returning to that school. We have found an online private school that we will be enrolling him in for no less than 2 years, more likely 3 or 4 years....he will complete what he needs and then we will re-visit him going back to public school at the high school level....but, will anticipate him not liking it and coming back to private school....all depends on how he matures and grows and how much he misses that daily interaction

and that's where we are. Because the principal won't apologize, Ken won't sit in on a meeting where he is present, and so no meeting will be happening, apparently. I can totally understand Ken's view, and the principal does NOT present himself the same.....one way when we all went to the same church and he was in our Sunday school, and a totally opposite way when he's sitting behind the desk at the middle school

When my oldest son was in middle school and having horrible problems, I fin= ally figured out the problem. I turned to the (nasty, snarky, patronizing a= nd generally rude)principal and asked him 'Did you like Middle School?' His= face lit up and he began to go on and on about how wonderful his middle s= chool years had been, how he blossomed and grew and just was happy as a cla= m. It suddenly hit me, the people who loved middle school -- most likely th= e bullies and top dogs and the ones giving the other kids a hard time -- gr= ew up to become middle school teachers and administrators.=20

The only help we got the whole way through middle and high school for my ol= der son, who ... doesn't really fit ... was that he needed to learn to conf= orm to the expectations of the other kids. Yeah, right ...

Glad you're taking him out of school for a while. Wish I'd been brave enoug= h and strong enough and smart enough to do that for my son.

Sunny

ouch!

I loved school - middle and high school. I was not in the popular crowd. I was pretty well scared of my own shadow, so I certainly didn't even come close to being a bully, a top dog, nor did I give other kids a hard time.

What I had was a few close friends and we had fun together. We liked each other, supported each other and even though it was 6 girls, we got along well together.

I am not a middle school teacher nor an administrator.

I'm sorry your son had such a hard time. I'm sorry you as a parent had to go through that and see your son struggle like that.

However, we don't all fit your generalization of people who liked school. Not all of us who enjoyed school were (or continue to be) mean.

marcella

this is interesting. middle school here is actually jr.hi 7-8 grade. My sister who wouldn't fit in or find school work worth the bother got ME into catholic school in

7th grade because mom didn't want to go through jr. hi hell again. Then we moved, then we moved again. I went through 6th grade with kids I knew all my life then ended up in 6 schools in 5 years (6th -10th grade) By the time I landed in the high school I graduated from I was over trying to fit in. I never got in trouble but really checked out socially and pretty much academically. My mom let me skip a lot of days and that was awful in the long run. I needed to be there learning to make it work better than I did, not checking out. I made a huge effort for my kids to stay planted where they were for school years. Those middle years are really tough for a lot of kids. I have to say the teachers and staff at our kids jr.high were a mostly great bunch of teachers. I helped out in the library and got to see a lot of good work they did first hand. I don't remember mean, some rotten apples but not any more mean than any cross section of society, probably less. DD says getting through public high school is a good way to learn how to survive adulthood. Taria

ouch!

I loved school - middle and high school. I was not in the popular crowd. I was pretty well scared of my own shadow, so I certainly didn't even come close to being a bully, a top dog, nor did I give other kids a hard time.

What I had was a few close friends and we had fun together. We liked each other, supported each other and even though it was 6 girls, we got along well together.

I am not a middle school teacher nor an administrator.

I'm sorry your son had such a hard time. I'm sorry you as a parent had to go through that and see your son struggle like that.

However, we don't all fit your generalization of people who liked school. Not all of us who enjoyed school were (or continue to be) mean.

marcella

Your DD is right - but that doesn't mean you have to carry the group with you for life. Mr Esther and I are planning to attend his ... my golly! His

60th class reunion. A wonderful, caring, hilarious gang. I wouldn't attend my own class get-togethers at gun point. They'll just have to "one-up" and backstab without me. Moving on - I saw on the news today that more than 100 teachers in Atlanta had been caught encouraging cheating on tests. Methinks our public schools (which are actually government schools) are in big trouble. Polly

"Taria" >wrote in part: DD says getting through public high school is a good way to learn how to survive adulthood.

Oh, Polly - you make me laugh. We go to DH's class reunions every five years and have a great time. We're living in our home town (we've been other places since graduation, but returned here because of family), and he sees his classmates about once a month for coffee, too. Their class is very close!

I graduated 10 years later, and our class hasn't had a reunion since the

16th (yes, the 16th)! We didn't have any major problems (no snobbishness, no bullying, etc.) during high school, so I'm not sure why no one has taken on the job of organizing reunions. I know why I haven't, but usually there's someone in the class who is wanting to do it. If we had one now, I'd probably go, but I doubt that's gonna' happen!

Louise > Your DD is right - but that doesn't mean you have to carry the group

I guess every group of grads has a different dynamic. After 60 years of reunions with a fun group you are one of them at this point.

What a shame to think of teachers cheating. I guess if they get fired for cheating they can run for a government office since they are already practiced in doing what politicians do best. : (

I'm headed to quilt with friends today. Dad refers to them/us as the 'blanket ladies'.

Taria

Your DD is right - but that doesn't mean you have to carry the group with you for life. Mr Esther and I are planning to attend his ... my golly! His

60th class reunion. A wonderful, caring, hilarious gang. I wouldn't attend my own class get-togethers at gun point. They'll just have to "one-up" and backstab without me. Moving on - I saw on the news today that more than 100 teachers in Atlanta had been caught encouraging cheating on tests. Methinks our public schools (which are actually government schools) are in big trouble. Polly

"Taria" >wrote in part: DD says getting through public high school is a good way to learn how to survive adulthood.

Wow....sorry I missed so much....been sidelined with back issues and then trying to get DDs Easter dress and coat done...dress is finished, coat....erm...nowhere near to being done.

Only a select few teachers at the school know of our plans for next year, and the school office won't be notified until after we receive the final report card for the year. At that point, I will request my son's records (mainly so that I can put copies of his grade reports from the online school in his file)...if need be, I'll have the online school request them.

Right now, I'm prepping for the annual summer school work at home....because both children are so thin, we are going to be working on increasing their caloric intake and starting strength training....starting with simple body-weight only exercises, and gradually building up to using weights (light given the kids ages and current weights and abilities).

Thomas has taken 2 placement tests for the online school and did exactly as we expected he would...he scored high enough to pass 7th grade math, so we will be enrolling him in 8th grade math, but he didn't score high enough on the 7th grade language arts test to skip it, so he will be enrolled in 7th grade language arts....now I need to figure out what else to enroll him in...probably 7th grade social studies, and maybe 8th grade science....have to get in contact with our liason at the school to confirm this.

The great thing is that both children are looking forward to summer school and Thomas is excited for next school year....now if I can just keep them excited it will be fabulous....

Larisa....still moving right along.....oh, and they will be starting on their first sewing patterns/projects this summer as well....

Thanks for keeping us up to date.

I am so glad you are looking forward - and that the children are happy. That makes all the difference.

Happy Easter to you and your family.

Di Having a beautiful autumn sunny day and loving it in Vic Aust..

"off kilter snipped-for-privacy@somwherequiet.net" wrote in message news: snipped-for-privacy@db5g2000vbb.googlegroups.com...

I'm happy that things are moving smoothly for you and the children. Hope the summer school will work out well, and I'm glad you are keeping us up to date. Barbara in FL