Thanksgiving Day - some advice please

Okay, this is what I would do, but that's not saying it's the "right" thing.

Regarding a gift, what is the usual custom in Australia? If we were going to someone's home as a guest (other than immediate family), I'd be likely to take a bottle of wine or a plant or something of that nature. As for food, I'd ask what they'd like me to bring. Generally I would do that at the time the invitation was extended. Our family gatherings are quite large, and the host family provides the turkey, but the rest of us each bring a dish to contribute to the meal. My sister (the hostess) usually "assigns" who is to bring what. My guess is that if they're doing a "traditional" Thanksgiving, they'll probably say it's not necessary to bring anything, but an offer vr

As far as dressing up, I'd ask your daughter. At our family gatherings, the dress code is definitely casual, but I know that others dress up more than we do.

American Thanksgiving is celebrated with a big dinner, usually including roast turkey. Americans do not customarily exchange gifts on Thanksgiving. However, it is customary in America whenever one is invited to a meal at someones home to bring a "house gift" -- a bouquet of flowers, a bottle of wine, a box of sweets, or some such. Since you are such a talented quilter, it might be nice to bring a mini-quilt or tablerunner for their home -- one with an autumn theme. But don't overwhelm your hosts with anything too spectacular. :-)

You could also ask your daughter or the host family if you should bring something special for the meal. For "potluck" type dinners, guests are often asked to bring something in particular, like bread or wine or a dessert, or some special dish that your hosts know you are particularly good at preparing. For dinners that are not "potluck," guests do not usually bring food (except something simple like a bottle of wine as a "house gift," which might not even be served at the day's meal if the hosts have chosen their own wines in advance).

ep

Let me just add, that here in the states, if I ask you to bring something specific, I do appreciate that you brought what I suggested you bring (I usually give folks a choice of items). When I tell you not to bring anything except yourselves, I usually do appreciate a bottle of wine, flowers, etc. Please do not bring another dessert, side dish or main dish, etc. I have already prepared them and yet I will feel obligated to serve yours despite the fact that it doesn't really go with the meal.

Nancy

to someone's home as a guest (other

or something of that nature. As for

the time the invitation was extended.

urkey, but the rest of us each bring

s" who is to bring what. My guess is

it's not necessary to bring anything,

he dress code is definitely casual,

Louise and Edna Pearl gave you really good replies Di. Thanksgiving means FOOD and lots of it! It's a celebration harking back to early Pilgrims that settled in this land and how they survived with the help of Native Americans. Not a gift giving time but it's always nice to take a small 'house' gift like wine or flowers to a gathering like this. In my area of the country, we always ask if we can bring something and the hostess will let us know. We don't dress up at our house, just nice casual clothes. You might ask your daughter what she is wearing and take her advice. It will be fun and you'll get to experience one of our truly American traditions. Oh, the meal is always followed by hours of football on tv and lots of groaning from over eating! Donna

That is interesting. I guess we are just so casual and large a family extra dishes of any kind are always appreciated. There is NO extra dish that doesn't fit in around us. LOL It is so easy and fun to share any leftovers. That just shows how wide the variation in the celebration is.

Thanksgiving here is in the fall but you will be opposite so not sure how they address that. Usually sweet potatoes/yams are involved. Cool weather kinds of food. One of the things that seem to show up too often is that terrible green bean casserole. Turkey with dressing but many are doing hams in addition these days. I would imagine they dress in Sunday go to meeting clothes. Nice but not formal.

Just a hostess gift should do in addition to anything you might have offered or asked to bring.

Thanksgiving is about my favorite holiday because it isn't a gift holiday. It is just food and the joy of your family/friends. Not a lot of fuss but the cooking. You will enjoy it Di. Taria

I reckon you'd better have lots of clear talks with your daughter. Just no telling what their notion of a Thanksgiving Day celebration might entail. One side of our family brings food and comes dressed for a rough game of tackle softball. ( Cheating is encouraged and they have raised 'stealing base' to a new level.) Another side polishes the sterling, wears the 'good' pearls, wine is not acceptable and bringing food would very insulting. We love both sides but you'd just better know lots about which way you're going. Please let me recommend an entertaining and helpful book: What Can I Bring? by Anne Byrn. She has lots of good ideas, recipes and thoughtful ways to be a welcome guest. Polly

I'm one of those weirdos that loves green bean casserole!

Donna in SW Idaho

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One year I realized too late that I didn't have any green beans for the traditional casserole but I did have a lovely bundle of asparagus. Used the generally same recipe but the asparagus instead of beans. Didn't think anybody noticed or cared; we're supposed to have a 'green', right? Wrong. The next year, 4 year-old great nephew especially requested that his mother make Aunt Polly's green bean casserole. He cried when her green bean casserole didn't taste as good as Aunt Polly's. Poor dear. She didn't know mine didn't have green beans. She has forgiven me. I would never Ever be so cruel as to share a recipe and leave out an important ingredient or secret. Now my green bean casserole is a tradition at her home. Nephew's bride needs to be warned. Polly

"Donna in Idaho" <

Thank you all. Firstly, I should have made this an OT, my apologies for not doing that.

Your advice and suggestions are great and I think I will take EPs advice and make a small table runner - I do have some quite lovely material that would do the job.

We are looking forward to meeting them. Polly, I am going to try and get that book over here in Aus. It is just what I need.

Cheers,

On Thu, 3 Jun 2010 21:10:47 -0500, DiMa wrote (in article ):

Thanksgiving is different in each family. Generally, no gifts (unless the extended family is also celebrating Christmas at the same time because they won't be able to get together in December).

Each family has their traditional favorite foods, etc. Basically, for many if not most families, it's a big, nice dinner party. If you were invited to dinner at my house, I'd be wearing "dressy casual" clothes, the sort of think I might almost where to work without the blazer or the high heels. David would be in jeans and a sweatshirt.

Can you ask DD if Partner's family does a "potluck" type of meal? If so, you might ask the hostess what you could bring or bring one of your own family favorite side dishes. If you aren't expected to contribute and you want to bring something, I'd suggest flowers or wine or whatever else you'd usually bring as a hostess gift to a dinner party.

Maureen

On Thu, 3 Jun 2010 22:16:00 -0500, Taria wrote (in article ): One of the things that seem to show

Hey, I love that green bean casserole. Thanksgiving was about the only time I'd eat green beans as a kid.

Course, now I love green beans and we eat them at least once a week around here (unless it's aspargus season) and now cream of mushroom soup necessary.

Maureen

It's not a gift-giving event. But as a guest, you probably want to bring something, just as you would to any other dinner party.

Do ask if you may bring a dish to share. IMO a Thanksgiving feast can never have enough side dishes and desserts. Every family has its own list of essential basics, which almost always include turkey and gravy, cranberry sauce or relish, and something with corn (maize), plus pumpkin and/or apple pie. But you could volunteer to bring your signature dessert and not cause offence. OTOH, don't be offended if the hostess says no thanks: some families are rabid purists. If that's the case, you can always bring a bottle of wine (assuming they aren't teetotallers).

Recommended cloth>Hi to all the USA posters,

I am really looking forward to the feast but have to advise that all my trousers are elastic-waisted.

Thank once again for your fantastic comments.

Cheers.

Howdy!

potato chip topping? Roberta? (around here they used canned "fried" onions...go figure. Well, it's all gloop, this would make it crunchy gloop.

Thanksgiving Day is for quilting. ;-)

R/Sandy - not fond of gray foods (canned mushroom soup)

LOL!! Sandy! I am a big fan of "the green bean gloop"!! It's a Turkey Day tradition around here.

We usually have 20+ people here for Turkey Day. I love when anyone brings anything! More the merrier! that goes for additional people to feed as well!, we have lots of "drop-ins" on Turkey Day and most of them are young, male and hungry! LOL! It's, literally, soup to nuts here!

I would ask in your case tho. Some people plan a menu and desserts "just so" and don't appreciate deviating from their plans. Wine, flowers, fruit basket, etc. are all great gifts for you to bring to the hostess.

Have fun and relax. Eat, drink and be merry! Elastic waist or unbutton the top button of those khaki's! We wear what's comfortable, not too dressy and stain resistant. ( some of us with bigger chests tend to wear gravy at some point!)...

amy in CNY

Howdy!

We accept all food, for Thanksgiving & any other get-together. Husband & I, however, do not touch GBC; don't have to, can't make me. S-i-l no longer brings hers (I don't leave her room in the kitchen to prepare it here, either ); our (grown) kids don't miss it (they can make their own if they really want it ). I'll hand 'em the salt shaker if they get a craving for "green bean gloop". LOL Yeah, we're funny about that, and love to make fun of it. I mean, c'mon, how big a deal is it, canned green beans (salt) & canned gray soup (salt) & canned fried onions (salt), thrown in a bowl and baked, then add more canned onions (salt) - ? I'll pass. To each, her own. Reminds me of that whole home bar-b-q production. 8->

While the turkey is roasting, the guests are arriving, the parade is processing on the t.v., the quilting continues; no ones goes home hungry, and the house rocks w/ laughter and song.

Cheers! Sandy