Six failed batches in, I finally figured out the thing that made everything click, so let me save you the misery. Your butter and your dough need to be the same temperture, full stop. Not sort of close, not 'the butter feels fine', actually the same. I press my butter into a flat square inside a zip-top bag, whack it with a rolling pin, then sit it on a tray in the fridge next to the dough for a good half hour so they equalize.
When you lock the butter in and do that first roll, go slow. If you feel resistance or the butter starts sliding to one end, stop and chill the whole thing for 15 minutes. Warm spots are what cause the blowouts and the butter squirting out the sides.
One more thing, because it kept me up at night my first time. Small tears and smears in the layers after fold one are normal. Patch it, dust off excess flour, roll again. Even a slightly messy lamination still bakes up flaky, so don't bin the dough halfway through. Three folds, proper chill time between each, and you'll be fine.