Lampwork

Well, here's what I do - I have a clause in my auctions asking buyers with less than 3 feedback to email me first before bidding. That way I can check their ID against what I know about the psycho, and generally get a feeling for them before they bid. The clause says I have the right to cancel and block those who do not comply. And I do enforce that, but it hasn't happened very often. I word the clause very respectfully and politely. So far, it's helped a lot. Also, make sure that if you accept personal checks, you state that the item will be shipped after the check clears the bank. Make your auction and selling terms crystal clear - especially any return policy you might have. These things have really eliminated most of my problems. There are always going to be the occasional NPB (non-paying bidder), but you can always file to get your fees back and relist the item, and report the offender to eBay. I haven't had many problems that didn't involve this psycho bidder specifically. I have been selling on eBay for about 5 years - doing jewelry and miscellaneous stuff before lampwork. Read the message boards at eBay if you have the time - that can help. Be forwarned though - you have to sift through some garbage there to get the good information. Anyway - I wish you good luck!

On Thu, 7 Aug 2003 2:12:16 -0400, Dr. Sooz wrote (in message ):

IME, nastiness and bad karma always catch up with the offender. It's not always the results we wish for, e.g. the bad guy ends up on the street, homeless with leprosy, while people throw rocks at them from passing cars.

But it always happens. It might be as simple as the bad guy never knowing a moment of peace or as drastic as ending up alone, friendless and unwanted.

Does anyone really think that this person can wear the beads without thinking about the nasty way she obtained them? Even if she's laughing on the outside, thinking she really pulled one over on someone, I have to believe that the voice within is keeping her from feeling the happiness that comes from knowing that the items were honestly obtained.

One other possibility is that this person is really seriously mentally ill, and getting beads by whatever means necessary is a compulsion she cannot control. In which case, she's not getting any joy out of them - imagine taking and taking and taking, knowing that there is a real danger of getting caught, and never being satisfied with the items she has. I'd bet that there's a huge jealousy component in this as well - she cannot create such beauty on her own, so she's going to hurt those who have that ability. (Kath says, wearing her amateur psychologist beanie for the moment)

Frankly, I hope she gets caught and prosecuted. She's hurt an awful lot of people, including herself.

Kathy N-V

Kandice, thank you for giving me your sage advise. I've saved your post to my growing jewelry folder!

Does anyone know if this new littlecat bidder is the psycho or not? I know of 3 very concerned and nervous sellers.

-- Margie See my auctions:

If you mean the fluffy variety, my instincts are saying yes, this person is the psycho. Contact info and emails are very suspicious and very telling.

It does help! Thank you, I will inform these sellers post haste.

-- Margie See my auctions:

And thank you on behalf of those who are finding themselves in a very precarious position right now. I will be passing on this information.

-- Margie See my auctions:

:) Excellent - thanks Margie!

It is a beanie that fits you well, IMO.

And I share your feeling that no one who is happy and at peace within themselves would ever do this kind of thing, and that lots of people who *do* in fact do this kind of thing are in a kind of choiceless, compulsive loop of repetitive behavior, rather than acting out of a sense of free choice. What does it feel like to want to do something mean and destructive to other people? Well, I don't think it feels at all good.

Should that behavior be tolerated? No, I would never say that. But is the person doing it out of 'evilness'? Probably not. For me, the evil is whatever force or event creates the choicelessness they are acting out.

*That's* what I'd like us to learn to break. The pattern, not the person. Because breaking the pattern frees both the compulsion-driven destroyer, and their victims.

Deirdre

Welcome Julie!!!! I love your work.

-- KarenK Desert Dreamer Designs

Store:

Ugh... Posting this your way Kandice - you seem to have the most info in regard to 'Madame Nasty'!

Had my first run in with 'Madame' two years ago, shipped the beads, mastercard charged back! (surprised???)

Fought it out, took the loss, & got over it! She seemed to drop out of sight, and I figured I had heard the last of her.

Then a few weeks back, she bid on, and won some of my auctions. Paid promptly, and, I didn't notice the name, although I'm not sure why. Those items have since shipped.

Now, she has bid on more, and won, and...I'm in a lurch - I'd like to refund her money, but, I'm concerned she'll get nasty, then claim that she didn't receive the first lot!!! (She had made other bids too, but, they had been cancelled my admin after she had paid for the first batch, and, after I had shipped them.)

I have a some info on her, names, userids, etc, and I heard there's an entire forum on WetCanvas regarding this person.

Any ideas, advice, prayers??? :)

Janice BonEchoLampworks RandomActsOfBeadwork

I can personally attest to Janice's work. :)))) I've been buying her little Willendorf Goddess figures for awhile now and they are gorgeous; well cleaned and very well executed. In fact, Kandice has one of her goddess figures and probably doesn't even know it! lol... I made a gorgeous purple & green one into a fertility necklace that I gifted Kandice with. :))))))

Oooooooohhh!! I LOVE that necklace and wear it all the time!!! It's lovely! :)

vj found this in rec.crafts.beads, from "Christina Peterson" :

]I already put ]you on my "watch" list.

is there a way i can set my browser to "follow Tina"?

----------- @vicki [SnuggleWench] (Books)

Bill of Rights - Void where prohibited by Law.Regime Change in 2004 - The life you save may be your own.