OT: Has anyone here 'transitioned to gray' after coloring hair?

Gwen, Yes, I've made the 'transition'! I, too, like somone else in this thread mentioned, had colored my hair for so long, the damage was far, far too bad. Hair breaking off, etc. I also had the initial 'skunk stripe' through the middle of my head before the gray became more consistent, hence the reason for the coloring in the first place. I just went cold turkey and stopped coloring. I'm sure it looked quite hideous for a period but I didn't feel it was any worse than the damage. My natural color is/was a light-medium brown. I started the growing out process a couple of years before my 50th. I also still wear my hair shoulder-length. Still lots of damaged brown with bits of grey from about the ears down but MUCH more gray at the roots. Suits both me and DH just fine. He's also several years younger and has more gray in his beard than I have on my head - which is also fine by me. My hair was also always very coarse and the damage from coloring just made that even more pronounced/worse. I'm guessing/ hoping that the balance will be completely grown out in another few years. I also did my own coloring as opposed to salon coloring. Stylists always tell you their products are 'better' but frankly I've never been impressed with the condition of long-time colored hair by any of them either.

I say Go For It. Again, as someone else said - it's only hair - you can always change your mind.

Kim

LOL, that is my thought, too. I tried just doing some reddish highlights in my hair, and I did like the look. BUT.....it would have cost me $50.00 every two months, which is a big chunk out of my income; also, the second time we did it, the hairdresser got some red into a lovely white streak, at my upper left temple, that I wanted to preserve and it looked yucky to me. So I just let it grow out.

I earned every one of those gray hairs, and I choose to flaunt them. Luckily, my medium-brown is turning gray in silver white. Mom had very dark hair, and her yellowish-gray hair made her look dingy for years. Now that it's all snow white, she looks lovely.

OTOH, I know ladies at work (non-quilters, and two-income families, so their priorities and disposable incomes are different than mine) who cheerfully spend $100.00 or more each time. I just keep thinking of all the fabric I could buy!

I'm in total agreement, Nightmist. I like either long hair or none on men. Both are extremely sexy on the right person.

I get highlights done twice a year, but they do not cover up all the silver. I like the way the silver lightens up my dark-brown hair, but I also like the way the expensive auburn highlights lighten it up too. It's true that when you look carefully, you can see that on the top of my head my hair goes from five-tone to two-tone, but it doesn't bother me much - my hair is curly and not tidy-looking anyway.

My hairdresser says that if/when I decide to stop having highlights, I should just wait a little longer and then get a shorter cut. She also warns that the texture of my hair will change as it gets more silver, and possibly it won't be as curly.

Louise, in Kingston Ontario.

I've been wondering about this too. I am 53 and ready to go natural. I just got a short hair cut. Mine has gotten curly in the last 3 years which is amazing and kind of fun after all those years with straight hair. I will see what my stylist suggests next time it is due for a touch up. Debra in Idaho

Not to mention the time it would all take. I decided a few years ago to go grey (dis)gracefully. The only time I have had my hair coloured was when I was maid of honour for my sister-in-law (who colours hers) as I did not want to younger & greyer. However I'm still a decade off my half century.

Lizzy

I am really enjoying this thread! For what it's worth... my new colorist suggested transitioning by doing a 'full set of foils" which to me came out looking just like it used to look when they'd frost it, using that horrid plastic cap and pulling through hair with a crochet hook... excrutiatingly painful! It really looks frosted now, and if I look closely, I can see the 'halo' someone mentioned, of silvery roots. I don't love the 'pale blonde' look when my hair is down (it is shoulder length), but I am happier now when it is pulled back into a pony tail, or wrapped up in a bun. I guess if I decide to find my old makeup box, and start wearing makeup (my daughter's suggestion), it will look better. Yes, the change in color makes my skin look different. I've had a few moments of thinking, "oh, it looked better dark, with highlights," but I decide once again to tough it out. There was no way I could live with just letting it 'grow out' with an increasingly larger 'frame' of gray. This gray is a pretty silvery white. The hairdresser explained that it is almost without any pigment. The ugly mousy gray that came in years ago was with some pigment. My hair is very thick and healthy, even after years of coloring. I use really good hair products, to keep it from frizzing. Never thought they'd make a difference, but they really do (at least for me). Saw my best and oldest friend the other day, who hates my hair. But she hates the thought of getting older, colors her hair, won't leave the house without makeup (lots of it), etc. etc. Spends a lot of time talking to me about how her body is changing as she ages, and how much she hates it. I just laugh at her -- but find that it's getting tiresome to listen to. I remember feeling depressed at turning 50, and thinking back (I'm a therapist, so often think about the context of things in life), realize that it wasn't the turning 50 per se, but the things that were (and were not) going on in my life. Almost 15 years later, I have lived for a long time thinking, "I am what I am..." (does anyone remember the line in the kids' book, "I yam what I yam" ??) My life is full and rich and I have so much joy with my DH and kids and grandkids. My friend who is devastated at her aging process cannot say the same thing, so perhaps her outlook both out and in can be understood... in context. Gwen in SE PA

I just started using a semi permanent colour, in a paler shade than my colour, which last (it says) for 28 washes. It blends in with "normal" colour hair and I don't get the strong roots showing through like I had with the permanent colour. I will stick with it until I have enough silver to leave it. I m like a Badger without the colouring.lol

Oh, for sure. Double-poop to what the kids, or anyone else thinks. Just my most humble opinion, which also is that spending $65,000 on hair color is a little obscene. But I guess it depends on whether you have that much disposable income. I sure don't! DH & I cut each other's hair. It's great. We've been doing this for over 10 years now. We're really getting good at it. LOL (Or at least *we* think so--isn't that what counts?)

Sherry

Like you mine is coming in the silvery white, I am vain enough though that I insist calling it platinum blonde, luckily though when I was younger I was an actual blonde, mind you I was a gold blonde my brother was the white blonde. For me it is just hair, it keeps on growing so that if you want to color it for yourself go for it, get it cut short when the color grows out, your hair will keep growing. I like what you said near the end of your post, I think I hit that phase early, I started thinking that way in my early 30's along with that its not my job to make others happy, my job is to make me happy first. When I am happy it just spreads around to others around me. This is coming from someone who spent the first part of the some what short time on this earth, trying my best to look after everyone else and ignored me. So for the rest of the time I have left, I am going to look after me first then I will help the others, but I am not going to take responsibility for their lives any more. (Selfish) Dawn in Alberta When Life gets you down Get up and Mambo

Yes it is an interesting thread.. and here's my two pence worth

I'm 52 and have greying hair, possibly more that 50% by now. I let it go natural then saw my picture taken one Christmas and realized just how grey I was. See my profile pic which is the same pic cropped taken a couple of years ago. I was going off to visit my mum in Spain. I'm not saying all Spanish folk are vain but my mum and sisters (all 70+) are and always dye their hair. I didn't want to spend 2 weeks getting nagged by everyone about the colour of my hair. Soooo I decided to have it dyed.... a deep plummy shade. It was a gorgeous colour but it did not suit my colouring at all. My aunts said I should have gone blonde! My daughter on the other hand thought my hair was lovely. My sister who was there at the time also, said I should let my hair grow. There is no pleasing folk so you may as well please yourself. When I got home I thought I'd grow my hair longer and at the same time grow out the colour. However, when I could stand it no longer I went along to the hairdresser and got it all cropped off. At that stage there was just a little colour left in the ends so a few weeks later I got that cropped off. Then I went and got a box of lightest Ash Brown and got my daughter to put it on for me. She said I should have put on a darker one, so when that had almost grown out and after a haircut I bought a box of a slightly darker shade. I didn't like it though my daughter said it looked better. But I thought it really didn't suit my skin tone. So the last time I had it done I got the lighter one. It's a Garnier product and is gentle on my hair. Most other ones, including the one the hairdresser used, made my hair texture change so that it was unmanageable. The Belle color I use is gentle and cheaper, only a few quid for a box. A DD cost is nada. (I do her hair 4 times more often) Like a few other ladies on here I have streaky greying hair, the streak being from my right temple. I now keep my hair very short and being naturally curly (a plus for me at this age - it was always a pain when I was younger) it takes very little looking after. I wash it and rub Vavoom hair gel through and I'm done. I'll go completely au natural one day but not just yet;)

Elly ps I think men that are balding look oh so much better if they go the whole hog and cut it all off. Keep trying to tactfully get my hubby to do that.;) He had long hair when we first me.

gwen wrote:

wow! you really started something with this topic!!!! i told my DD about it yesterday when i got home, she said i should do what makes me happy! i was floored to say the least since she and my DS were the ones who dont want me to go gray at all. so, i decided, that what makes me happy is to have no fuss hair.I'm going to gradually go back to the lighter shade and let the gray come back gradually, too. it wont be so drastic and i can do it myself. A kit box of L'Oreal is cheaper than the salon fees, and i dont have to tip anyone. amy

You ladies who are worried about "transitioning to gray" should have my problem. My hair is getting thin at the front and I can see my scalp through the hair, no actual bald spots, just thin. One of my father's sisters had thin hair, and my mother's father was very bald. I'm not diabetic, my thyroid is OK, it's just heredity. I tried Rogaine for 3 months (one box) with no visible change, so now I just part my hair on the side to make the top fuller. It's funny, but my hair looks better cut short, so that is how it is. I have been considering if I should get a wig for when I want to look dressy, but so far the answer is No. Jane in NE Ohio

i'm afraid i haven't had a chance to read all the responses to this.... but I have to say as a long time allergy and asthma sufferer I have found that "reverting" to my natural color has indeed has a positive impact on my health. I had my colorist match my colour and let nature do the rest. Only one "colour" to match what I figured to ge my colour and let it be. I've had a lot of compliments as my white/grey grew in and wish I'd done it a long time ago

There is an article in a magazine currently on newsstands at the checkout line in the grocery store about this very subject. My natural color is dark brown, and I have been using non-permanent color mostly, with the occasional permanent color when my hair was very long. I also do highlighting myself with Clairol Frost & Tip.

I have gray sneaking in, more and more with all the stress going on right now, especially at the temples, same as my dad's. What I did is, when I pulled my hair through the cap for highlighting, I pulled only a very few strands through the holes - almost not enough to bother with really - and processed for 90 minutes. That made the highlighted strands almost white, and so they blend in nicely as a highlighting job, and make the grays look like part of the highlighting! ;) I also agree with whomever it was said the colorists do a too-even job; I prefer the more random look. You can pull your own hair through the top and sides and get a friend to pull through the back.

Why use permanent dye if you get temporary dye results plus damaged hair? Switch to temporary dye! It lasts for about 2 weeks so the fast speed of you hair growth would not be a factor, and since it just coats the hair it won't cause damage. You can even do it yourself at home for less than $20.

Here's your comparison: $200 per month plus damaged hair to dye your hair. or $40 per month to dye your hair without damage, plus $160 in stash! Debra in VA See my quilts at

From reading this thread I am beginning to think I have it good with my light brown hair turning white on the sides of my head.

I just bought a box of permanent hair color to do my own. I would rather not do it, but at 45, my white makes me look much older and I do need a job. I don't need my hair making me look old at an interview where I will be competing against 20 year olds.

I did play around with temporary dyes first to find a good color, and I loved them. They gave body to my straight hair and covered the white wonderfully. Another plus was that it was temporary so if I didn't like the color it would fade out and be gone in 2-3 weeks.

Gwen, try temporary dyes until the permanent dyed hair has all grown out and been cut off. You can move from a dark temp dye to progressively lighter ones until you are ready to show your gray. The transition from color to color won't be sudden so few people will notice it much, and you won't have the dreaded demarcation line between the old permanent dye job and your natural hair color. Debra in VA See my quilts at

Alas, I tried temporary color. Every time I washed my hair I had colored 'gunky' suds running off my head and it was a different color after every shampooing when it was dried. It faded away much too quickly. Maybe my hair is resistant to the coating of color or maybe my shampoo cleans too well? VBG Whatever. It didn't work for me. Bummer. It would have been a possible solution. And I only spend the $100 for professional foiling about every second or third month. Like someone else said, I get creative with my hairstyles to hide The Line.

Leslie & The Furbabies in MO.