Need more website feedback

My suggestion would be to put a link to the site in your sig so we don't have to search it out when you ask us to critique it! :) LOL :)

Duh! Sorry about that again. Going to do it right now.

Looks much better Starlia. It is straight foward, and gets to the point. The "Klopman Studios" thing looks much better. It clear and easily readable.

Marissa

Okay:

1. If you are talking about Klopman Studios as a "single being" then don't differentiate "Dan and I..." in the opening page. Something like "We hope to..." or "Our promise is to provide you with..." etc. I am not thinking in marketing writing terms right now, so don't pay attention to creative, but to grammar. We hope to, sounds like "we'd really like to provide you with one of a kind handmade glass beads..., but we probably won't, or we probably can't, or someday" rather than writing in the present..."We are proud to offer you our one-of-a-kind glass beads and bead sets, as well as ...."

1. Artist: personally, I dislike writing in the third person. Although you are a "she", you are writing about you, and even if you weren't, and someone else were writing about you, you might want to think about it in the first person.

Hope this helps. :) Lisa

Thanks Lisa and keep them coming!

Starlia, Okay, you may not like this one; I would be sensitive about it. You need a more professional looking picture of yourself or none at all. That one loooks like it was snipped off of a candid shot at a party. The more professionally you can present yourself, the better. If people are going to be doing business with you , they want to see something polished. I also think that the home page needs a large, goregous shot of your beads splashed across the page. Your beads are truly beautiful. Why not show them off immediately before you lose the "surfer"? The text could be shifted toward the left and the picture put across the right hand side of the page. Or, scrunch the text and enlarge the bead photos on the top. People are there to see beads. Period. If they like the beads, then they will want to know the specifics about how to see more ar buy from you. This can still be on the front page, but smaller and yet accessible. The Missions statement could be it's own link on the page (button on the left thing).

I tried to set up a website once. It was difficult. You are off to a good start. Again, your beads are gorgeous. Let them sell themselves. No one cares about the rest unless the beads wow them.

Kathy H

I truly appreciate all feedback. You are right about the photo. I really hate having my photo taken, but I'm meticulous when I'm taking photos. If I don't get the perfect shots it drives me crazy. I'll set up my studio and do some self photos. :-)

Thanks again. All this feedback is only going to make it a wonderful website for everyone.

My feedback relates to writing style and customer approach, so take it or leave it, I won't be wounded either way.

Your website takes an overall informal, friendly approach. Your bio is written in the same voice, but unlike the rest of your site, is written in third person. Although third person is a common and accepted professional device when presenting yourself, it is also a *formal* device. The casual voice of the bio is at odds with the formality of third-person narrative, so if you keep it third-person, rewrite the bio to be more formal. Also, the voice of the bio needs to be consistent with the rest of the website; either switch to first-person and keep it casual and personal, or make the entire site third-person and formal.

IME, lampwork buyers really respond well to the first-person approach.

-Kalera

Cool. I had planned to rewrite it back to first person. Thanks for the feedback. I really do appreciate the time you took to write.