A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking around with a fly swatter
"What are you doing?" She asked.
"Hunting Flies" He responded.
"Oh. ! Killing any?" She asked.
"Yep, 3 males, 2 Females," he replied.
Intrigued, she asked. "How can you tell them apart?"
"3 were on a beer can,
2 were on the phone"Oldie but goodie.
Here's one that I think I heard when I was in Junior High School, a long, long time ago--I'll start the groaning myself.
Back in the time when the Samurai were important, there was a powerful emperor who needed a new chief Samurai, so he sent out a declaration throughout the land that he was searching for the best one. A year passed, and only 3 people showed up for the trials:
...a Japanese Samurai
...a Chinese Samurai
...and a Jewish Samurai.
The emperor asked the Japanese Samurai to come in and demonstrate why he should be the chief Samurai. The Japanese Samurai opened a match box and out flew a bumblebee. Whoosh! Went his razor sharp sword, and the bumblebee dropped dead on the ground in 2 pieces. The emperor exclaimed, "This is impressive!"
The emperor then issued the same challenge to the Chinese Samurai for him to come in and demonstrate why he should be chosen. The Chinese Samurai also opened a match box and out buzzed a fly. Whoosh, Whoosh! went his great flashing sword and the fly dropped dead on the ground .....in four small pieces. The emperor exclaimed in awe, "That is really VERY impressive!"
Now the emperor turned to the Jewish Samurai, and asked him also to step forward and demonstrate why he should be the head Samurai. The Jewish Samurai also opened a match box and out flew a small gnat. His lightning quick sword went Whooooosh! Whooooosh! Whoooosh! but the tiny gnat was still alive and flying around. The emperor, obviously very disappointed in this display said, "I see you are not up to the task. The gnat is not dead?"
The Jewish Samurai just smiled and said: "Circumcision is not meant to kill."
Lucille, twenty lashes and go to your room rdh
I'm already in my room. lol
I sent it to Mike...so he can decide if Aya would understand the joke, or feel insulted. He might have to explain...and then she will think it hilarious.
Gill
She wouldn't feel insulted I am sure, but whether it will seem funny to her is quite another thing lol I am sure she is used to gaijin humour by this time.
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