NEW DRUGS. Some we need, some we need for our SO's. ______________________ St. Mom's Wort Plant extract that treats mom's depression and saves her sanity, by rendering preschoolers unconscious for up to six hours. _____________________________ Empty Nestrogen Highly effective suppository that eliminates melancholy by enhancing the memory of how awful they were as teenagers and how you couldn't wait till they moved out. ______________________________ Peptobimbo Liquid silicone for single women. Two full cups swallowed before an evening out increases breast size, decreases intelligence, and improves flirting. _____________________________ Dumerol When taken with Peptobimbo, can cause dangerously low I.Q. causing enjoyment of country western music. _____________________________ Flipitor Increases life expectancy of commuters by controlling road rage and the urge to flip off other drivers. ______________________________ Antiboyotics When administered to teenage girls, is highly effective in improving grades, freeing up phone lines, and reducing money spent on make-up. _____________________________ Menicillin Potent antiboyotic for older women. Increases resistance to such lines as, "You make me want to be a better person ... can we get naked now?" _____________________________ Buyagra Injectable stimulant taken prior to shopping. Increases potency and duration of spending spree. ______________________________ Extra Strength Buy-One-all When combined with Buyagra, can cause an indiscriminate buying frenzy so severe the victim may even come home with a Donnie Osmond CD or a book by Dr. Laura. ______________________________ JackAsspirin Relieves the headache caused by a man who can't remember your birthday, anniversary or phone number. _____________________________ Anti-talksident A spray carried in a purse or wallet to be used on anyone too eager to share their life stories with total strangers. ______________________________ Sexcedrin More effective than Excedrin in treating the, "Not now, dear, I have a headache," syndrome. ______________________________ Ragamet When administered to a husband, provides the same irritation as ragging on him all weekend, saving the wife the time and trouble of doing it herself.
OT: Another oldie but goodie
Oct 26, 2007
17 Replies
Good One!!
A middle-aged woman seemed timid and embarrassed as she visited her gynaecologist on an emergency call.
"Come now,"coaxed the doctor, "you've been seeing me for years! There's nothing you can't tell me."
"But this is kind of strange..." said the woman.
"Let me be the judge of that," the doctor replied.
"Well," said the woman, "Yesterday I went to the bathroom in the morning and I heard a plink plink in the toilet. When I looked down, the water was full of pennies."
"Mmmm, I see," said the doctor.
"And that afternoon I went again and there were nickels in the bowl!"
"Uh-huh." the doctor said as he got more and more interested in her story.
"That night," she went on, "there were dimes and this morning there were quarters! You've got to tell me what's wrong with me!" she implored. "I'm scared out of my wits!"
The gynaecologist put a comforting hand on her shoulder. "There, there. It's nothing to be frightened about..."
. . . . . . He said...."You're simply going through the change..."
Joan
Moan - as one who is going thru that joy - those aren't pennies from heaven C
Smack, smack, smack !
Sorry to crow - but I never even noticed it! My poor old Mum went through hell with it, though.
Pat
What?!?!?! *You're* the one who told me to post it!!!!
J
But wouldn't it be nice if we *really* got that kind of "change"???? It would make it all worthwhile, imo.
Joan, btdt, wondering when the flashes will go away, although they do come in handy once in awhile.....
And you believed her? Gonna start calling her Lucy and you Charlie Brown!
Elizabeth
Go back and read what I said ! I believe I said it had rctn written on it, didn't mean you had to post it lol
Nope, I was always called Diana, you know, the one waiting for God lol
Aaaa-just admit it. You are a born enabler !! RD&H
Raspberries in your direction.
C
Listen shrimp, Joan and I can both jump on you lol
Aha-but being a shrimp means I can squeeze into a narrow space you couldn't get into unless you used a shoehorn. ;^)
Yeah, what she said!!! ROTFL!
Joan
Have shoe horn, will travel lol
Kep `em coming - I`ll get the cream out of the fridge! I`ll dip them in chocolate first, of course!
Pat
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