OT - Sorta Story - High School Update

Waaaah! My baby is rushing headlong toward adulthood, and I'm happy and want to cry at the same time. She's been in high school a whole week and is like a different person. (Still a great person, but one that's a whole lot mature than the kid who "was so bored" all summer)

Manda's mostly taking AP courses (to obtain college credit), along with a couple of honors classes, because she didn't want to totally stress out, and we agreed. She's reporting that both levels are about the same, workwise (though I expect that will change), but the honors teachers spend quite a bit of time threatening the kids. "You know that taking honors classes is a real privilege, and you cannot goof off for even a moment." is a typical comment. The AP teachers, by comparison, make no such threats. They tell the kids "You've always been smart, or you wouldn't be here. This class is at your level."

I have had a million requests for all kinds of new adventures: Manda has told me that she wants to be an extra in a movie on Saturday, go to an R.E.M. concert, go to Spain over spring break, and join a couple of clubs that will keep her at school until 9 p.m. a couple of nights a week. Wow. So far, I've okayed Spain and am considering the rest of the requests. Probably no to the movie extra (because it's in an unsafe area of Boston, and she'd have to go alone), maybe to R.E.M. (if she can find someone to go along who can pony up $65), and we'll see about the late night school activities - if Grandpa can pick her up, then it's okay.

The requests to be allowed to date are coming fast and furious. I keep saying reasons why I think dating is a lousy idea for fourteen year olds, and somehow Manda keeps turning the conversation back to dating. I suspect that there is already someone waiting in the wings

- and Manda is trying to wear me down before Daddy finds out. I'll continue to follow my tried and true strategy: keep my eyes open and my mouth shut.

I wish my daughter had the "mouth shut" policy, but she's no more capable of it than I was at her age. Manda reported that she encountered some kids passing around a joint in a secluded corner, and she was horrified. I advised her to pretend she saw nothing and leave, but I think she's going to give them a lecture on the evils of drug use. (She's done it before) Let's hope that her thousands of dollars of orthodontic work aren't wasted when someone punches her in the mouth after she tells them the best way to live their lives.

My darling child habitually wears unmatched socks, which she considers her trademark. (Drives Bob crazy, I don't care) Her middle school friends all know about the sock thing and ignore it, but she's been stopped many times by her new classmates who want to tell her about her fashion misstep. :-)

Obligatory Bead Reference: Manda has requested and obtained several new watches. All are different, and she has them lined up on her dresser to make sure she doesn't wear the same watch twice in a week. She informed me this evening that she knows I love her "because you're pretty selfish with that lampwork, and you made me three watches with lampwork beads." (Wow - I hope she knows I love her for reasons other than that)

Kathy N-V

Reply to
Kathy N-V
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I'm with Manda on the socks thing. I started that probably in grade school and I still wear mismatched socks most of the time.

I know what you mean on the whole dating, going places, etc. The first time Heather broached us about going to Peru I almost fainted. Her Dad was dead set against while I was coming to. After thinking it over very well, talking with her dad, and giving over a thousand or so dollars the kid got to go. Then comes along Meghan who has known that Heather has done xyz...now she wants to do them. Geez! Where does the time go.

Now my college bound daughter wants to move out on her own at 17. Out of the question in both parent's eyes. I told her the only way that would happen is to join the military. That's what I did at 17 and she could do it too. Not happening thankfully but at least it shut her up for now. I gotta think of a better strategy before she does.

s
Reply to
starlia

On Tue, 14 Sep 2004 23:30:53 -0400, starlia wrote (in message ):

You need my father in law to live downstairs. Manda never, ever brings up leaving before college, "because it would hurt Grandpa."

Hey, no one said I had to play fair!

Kathy N-V

Reply to
Kathy N-V

It would hurt Heather to leave early too. We both refuse to support her if she leaves home. She could come and live with me but she hates Texas.

Reply to
starlia

I hope she realizes that she will be copied at some point. I bet she starts a fashion trend in her school. When I was in HS (oh...more than 6 years ago, yes, I'm a young'un) a friend of mine and I used to wear the striped guys tube socks with shorts...our "originality" didn't last long. :-P

Valerie

Reply to
Valerie

Heck yeah. My DD does this CONSTANTLY. Drives me nuts, but it's cute. She calls them "silly socks".

Reply to
Jalynne

vj found this in rec.crafts.beads, from "Jalynne" :

]Heck yeah. My DD does this CONSTANTLY. Drives me nuts, but it's cute. She calls ]them "silly socks".

Jamie did it, too. when she was coaching gymnastics, the kids always rushed her when she came in to see what she was wearing that day.

Reply to
vj

You can tell her that "auntie Barbara" says fourteen yr olds are much too young to date. Children grow up too fast. She has plenty of time. All those trite responses ;-) . Double dates at 15 to 15 1/2. Real dates at 16. She "may" be mature enough to handle the things that will come up in dating, but I guarantee the boy isn't! And by the time he is mature enough, he had better not be hanging out with 14 yr olds! So much pressure, so little time....

Reply to
Barbara Otterson

On Wed, 15 Sep 2004 21:57:18 -0400, Barbara Otterson wrote (in message ):

There's no 14 year old boy alive that has anything a 14 year old girl _wants!_ No money, no car, and they're likely to still be shorter and girlier than the girls. The girls need to shave more than the boys do!

And I'll be dipped if she thinks she's going out with an upperclassman! When I was growing up, most of my friends were boys. I have heard my share of bragging, and one of the things that freaked me out the most was the Senior boys betting among themselves aboout the number of freshmen girls they could "bag."

I know not all, or even most, boys are like that, but an eighteen year old that wants to be with a fourteen year old is trouble. No two ways about it. Auntie Barbara, your timeline is about like mine

- I said "groups going to the mall or movies at 14 is fine. Double Dating (no cars - Daddy can drive) is fine for age 15, and normal dating with a curfew at 16. I suspect that the boys who would want to take advantge will move on to easier pickings, once they find out all the fine print. :-)

Kathy N-V

Reply to
Kathy N-V

vj found this in rec.crafts.beads, from "Barbara Otterson" :

]Double dates at 15 to 15 1/2. Real ]dates at 16. She "may" be mature enough to handle the things ]that will come up in dating, but I guarantee the boy isn't!

EXACTLY, Kathy! tell her i said so, too!

Reply to
vj

vj found this in rec.crafts.beads, from Kathy N-V :

]I suspect that the boys who would want ]to take advantge will move on to easier pickings, once they find out ]all the fine print. :-)

a shotgun in plain sight might help, too.

Reply to
vj

Make little peyote covers for the shotgun shell (personalized with the boy's names of course!) Line them up on the mantel (or your equivelent!)

Later,

Helen C

Reply to
Helen C

On Thu, 16 Sep 2004 15:27:46 -0400, Helen C wrote (in message ):

Now, to make beaded pieces with the name "Juan Chang" on them. I'm not lying - I've heard the name two dozen times this week alone.

Kathy N-V

Reply to
Kathy N-V

Well... yeah, of course she shouldn't expect you to pay her living expenses if she moves out! That would be ridiculous. (Moving out = supporting self.) That said, it can be a tremendously powerful maturing experience to learn to be self-supporting before college, and it can help kids be more appreciative of the opportunity they are being given once they start college, with the consequence that they take it more seriously, study harder, and get better grades. Not to mention, since they know what working and paying bills is like, being GRATEFUL to their parents instead of taking college tuition for granted!

I have known far too many young people (my peers) who basically wasted their parents tuition money and regretted it later, when the workaday reality set in for them.

-Kalera

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starlia wrote:

Reply to
Kalera Stratton

I'm planning on having my friend Brian just happen to be hanging out... in uniform... with the patrol car parked in front of the house... when my girls start dating.

"What? Oh, yes, this is our old family friend Brian! I've known him since I was just a baby, he's practically my uncle. 'Bye Mom, 'bye Dad, 'bye Brian! I'll be home before ten, I promise!"

-Kalera

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vj wrote:

Reply to
Kalera Stratton

Chinese-Mexican? Well, with geneaology like that, the boy is probably

*FINE*. I don't blame her!

-Kalera

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Kathy N-V wrote:

Reply to
Kalera Stratton

vj found this in rec.crafts.beads, from Kalera Stratton :

]I'm planning on having my friend Brian just happen to be hanging out... ]in uniform... with the patrol car parked in front of the house... when ]my girls start dating.

that could work!

Reply to
vj

Or, Filipino? Kaytee "Simplexities" on

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Reply to
Kaytee

That name just makes me giggle.

Reply to
starlia

It would be okay if she didn't live in Alaska. Even though things are very different there it's no place for a 17 year old girl living alone. Ever.

Reply to
starlia

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