OT: Whine

Do I not ask enough questions? am I really terrible? is it because I am Christian?

huh?????

beth I doubt it has anything to do with it what-so-ever.

mostly there is so much discussion here- that one cannot "answer" everything --

a lot I read - if I don't know an answer to a question - I don't answer...

if it's not a topic of interest to me - I may ignore it - but that's not the writer- its the topic.... (i.e if it's politics - I'll skip it!) Or something that doesn't need comment - I may not bother - if we all answered every post - this board would be even HARDER to keep up with every day!!!!

Cheryl last semester of lawschool! yipee! DRAGON BEADS Flameworked beads and glass

Beth,

You bring up some good points. There is a "clic" here in the newsgroup and ALOT of the "outsiders" are just that... Outsiders. I personally have felt this way for a long time. I am not sure WHY some people make it to the "IN" group while others don't. You would think that because most, if not ALL of us are out of High School, this childish behavior would not happen. But sadly enough it does.

Threads about the weather and personal lives go on and on while good valid threads about bead, techniques and other such art are drop like a stinky fish.

I understand that we have growing friendships here in the newsgroup, I have made a few GREAT friends, But I don't do my daily chit chat with them here on the newsgroup, as this group is generally here to discuss Beads and Jewelry.

I am not sure this answered anything for you... but I needed go get this off my chest....I will probably get flamed for stating what I just did... But what the heck.

(Cough, Cough)

Nicole

********************************** ********************************** ICQ# 78285557 Yahoo IM: blackcatbeads

There will never be any flame from me, and I hope that everyone knows it. Maybe if there was a real need I might state an opinion, but that's about it.

I don't know why you aren't getting answers. I don't know very much about general beading, except how to make the buggers. I love beading, but I'm limited on my time doing it.

I hadn't realized there was a clic, but when have I ever been aware of anything? LOL I'm here and I'll try to answer any questions I can.

Starlia

Hmmmmm!!!!! Falmed?????

Propane...check! Oxy.....check!

Hmmm wheres that damnd igniter???????????

Oh well no igniter, and I DON'T use matches, so I guess no flame!!!!! 8P

Get it?????

Jim Redden J.Redden Design snipped-for-privacy@rochester.rr.com

You are too much. :-)

I usually only comment if I have a question or I know something about the subject. Your recent posts....well, i haven't ventured into that yet, but I want to, so have been following it. I personally could care less about cliques, and talk to whom I please.

vj found this in rec.crafts.beads, from "Jalynne" :

]I personally could care less about cliques, and talk to whom I ]please.

i already knew i loved you, little sister!

----------- @vicki [SnuggleWench] (Books)

newest creations: ----------- I pledge allegiance to the Constitution of the United States of America, and to the republic which it established, one nation from many peoples, promising liberty and justice for all.

vj found this in rec.crafts.beads, from "Black Cat Beads" :

]I am not sure this answered anything for you... but I needed go get this off ]my chest....I will probably get flamed for stating what I just did... But ]what the heck.

well, i for one love both you and your work, darlin'! i am SO impressed with what you have been doing lately!!!! but you need to get WELL. i'll be down again in two weeks and i want to be able to spend time with you!

----------- @vicki [SnuggleWench] (Books)

newest creations: ----------- I pledge allegiance to the Constitution of the United States of America, and to the republic which it established, one nation from many peoples, promising liberty and justice for all.

Beth, all I know is that personally, I never seem to have the answers to the questions you ask here. I've been ignorant about the things you've wanted info about. There was one either this morning or yesterday, and I didn't have a thing to say regarding the subject. (And you know I don't like to post when I have absolutely nothing to say.)

But you almost never post any more. I think a lot of the people who do post regularly get confused -- there's another Beth here now, for one thing. And of course the newer folks don't know who you are.

You've simply been absent from RCB for a while. You don't participate anymore. You used to participate a lot, but for the past few months you've disappeared. Maybe I'm not reading all your posts (AOL does eat posts frequently). And I know you love to participate, but -- you simply don't do that as far as I can see.

Please don't feel bad! I believe that's what it is (above). I know that for my part, I have no problems with you whatsoever, dearie! It's NOT YOU. It's the fact that you just seemed to go away, and only come back infrequently when you need to ask a question.

~~ Sooz

------- "Those in the cheaper seats clap. The rest of you rattle your jewelry." John Lennon (1940 - 1980) Royal Varieties Performance ~ Dr. Sooz's Bead Links

I do. Some people feel like they can talk all they want. Like me. I talk and talk and talk. Anyone here who feels like an outsider creates this for themselves. Nicole, you hardly ever say anything unless you're posting an ad.

It's not like this is high school. There is no "in" clique. Anyone can come here and post -- the world over. It's not like it's a community defined by geography, or gender, or anything else we're used to IRL. Anyone can come here and post, and it's her responsibility to do so when she has something to say.

If anyone here chooses to be quiet, that's *her* decision. I've felt ignored many, many times here on RCB, but I'd be willing to bet you all think of me as one of the "In Clique". And sure, I ignore some people here, but that's because I have no control over who hangs out here -- and there's no guarantee I'm going to be in love with every single person. To expect that any of us would love everyone here is unrealistic. And when I find someone a drain on my energies, or irksome, I feel free to killfile them. That way I can avoid being frustrated and gnashing my teeth when I come here to enjoy myself and have a little conversation. ~~ Sooz

------- "Those in the cheaper seats clap. The rest of you rattle your jewelry." John Lennon (1940 - 1980) Royal Varieties Performance ~ Dr. Sooz's Bead Links

I think you're being paranoid. I know I think of you with great fondness, Nicole, but I don't know you very well because you don't say much here.

What?!?

~~ Sooz

------- "Those in the cheaper seats clap. The rest of you rattle your jewelry." John Lennon (1940 - 1980) Royal Varieties Performance ~ Dr. Sooz's Bead Links

This is how I feel, too. ~~ Sooz

------- "Those in the cheaper seats clap. The rest of you rattle your jewelry." John Lennon (1940 - 1980) Royal Varieties Performance ~ Dr. Sooz's Bead Links

I'm glad you're comfortable enough to bring it up, Beth.

Everybody feels ignored here sometimes. Even the "popular" people, so you're in good company.

Any more questions?

Tina

The most common reasons for not commenting to a post in a newsgroup:

1) Have nothing useful to say. This is especially true if the post is a question about something. 2) Someone else already replied, and have nothing useful to add. 3) Didn't see the post. Remember, just because it shows up on *your* server doesn't necessarily mean that everyone will see it. Newsfeeds are notorious for being "flaky" and dropping stuff. 4) Didn't read the post. A lot of people here routinely "skim", reading only those threads which catch their eye immediately. And yes, sometimes this is related to whether or not they know the person who made the post -- but that's not by any means the only factor involved.

It's a common temptation to take it personally when your posts go unanswered. This is generally a mistake. If anything, it's more likely to be a coincidental accumulation of the 4 factors above. I make a *lot* of posts which get no visible response. Big deal.

Just out of curiosity, why in the world would you think your religion had anything to do with it?

Celine

Yes, I imagine you and I are talkative enough that people think we are in the "In" group. I also know there are times when I feel ignore and also that you feel ignored.

There are a very few people who always seem to get loads of answers, but most of those of us who have a presence here do so because we post -- more than that we're answered.

Tina

I have to disagree with you, Nicole. There is no "in-group" here -- but there

*are* some people who have more to say than others, and who frequently comment back and forth to each other. If you want people to talk with you, try starting (or joining) some conversations.

This I disagree with even more. I've seen lampwork and paua shell discussions that went on for *weeks*. And don't tell me you don't see all the "how should I price my work" or "what threading material is best" threads!

I think perhaps some of the technical threads drop quickly because they started with a question, and once that question has been answered, there's little more to say.

Right there, I think, is why you feel like an "outsider". You ignore the established group dynamics, you don't join in the group, and then you get annoyed because the group won't conform to what you think it "should" be.

We've had this discussion a number of times as well. This group is unmoderated, and off-topic posts are permitted, by overall consensus. The only rule we try to enforce is that people put OT in the header when posting off-topic... so that people who ONLY want to read on-topic posts don't have to put up with the random chatter.

Perhaps what's needed is rec.crafts.beads.moderated? But that means someone would have to put in the hours to be the moderator...

Celine

As a rank amateur compared to most here, I don't answer questions. I usually read questions, then scroll down the list looking for the answers.

I admit it - I don't read all the posts, I don't check all the ads (since I don't have *nearly* enough money to buy everything I'd like), and I don't follow all the threads. When I log on at night, there are usually a coupla hundred posts to scroll through and I end up reading about a dozen or so. I regulary read two newsgroups, and I get over a hundred emails every day from all the mailing lists I'm on.

That's been my experience. I'm sorry you're feeling ignored, though.

Cheers, Carla

After reading your question and some of the responses, I can see that a lot of people feel ignored sometimes. I usually only respond to a bead related question if it hasn't already been answered or if I think the person is looking for consensus of opinion.

I'd say your religion has nothing what ever to do with it.. There are many different religions here. As for cliques: could we drop this as a topic of discussion? I think we're all a bit long in the tooth for it.

For me it's because half the time I'm not home much and miss half the threads. I have to mark everything read and start over. I can't tell you how many times I've had to mark everything read because I just do not have the time to read it all and respond. And I too skim and if something jumps out at me I read it and may respond. I probably get to read about 20 percent of what is actually posted. The only time I am ever caught up is when I'm sick and have to stay home for days. ;-) Then I have the time to read everything.

I don't think there is really an "in" crowd IMO. People here are friends, many have met or established great friendships online and like the "homey" feeling they can get from here. And some have the time to respond to most of the threads. But I'd bet the majority do not. There are some that resond more than others and start more topics than others, but because they *do* have the time (and/or the expertise) doesn't mean they are a part of the "in" crowd.

I agree. Things like requests for patterns I don't respond to and will pass over, I don't have links for it and I don't have the time to do someone else's research. If I know the answer to something and someone else has given it already (or something similar to what I would have posted) I won't answer it. Why be redundant? It's just more posts that someone has to get through with all of the same answer.

If a question is asked "what kind of bead is this?" and nobody answers, it might be because nobody knows what bead it is. The one person who does may not have gotten the thread, or marked it read or isn't reading the newsgroup at the time.

Ok it's getting late and I've probably started to repeat myself. ;-) And for the record...this is the longest post I've written in a long while. I just don't have the *time* anymore to respond with more than a few sentences to things.

Valerie

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