A Recapitulation

Come on, Edward - Give! WHAT ARE YOU QUILTING???

If not quilting, why are you here at all?

Because "edward" is getting as much fun out of this as we are.

Karen, Queen of Squishies

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Yeah... Troll baiting can be fun, and we get to tease them with chocolate and FQ's without having to give them any! ;)

I doubt Eddie even knows what a FQ is.

Pam

Edward W. Thompson wrote in news: snipped-for-privacy@4ax.com:

Oh for Pete's sake! This is a _virtual_ *discussion* group! Who cares? Why don't you spend your energy fighting the fights that matter? Go use your indignation to save the _REAL_ the world of more serious problems!

Oooops! Ah! Caught another reply to EWT.

Oh, this is just too good LOL

I must "unblock" this guy - if only for his amusement value. And don't forget Sally - banter with/at/about him is cheaper than therapy.

I think I must be mellowing in my old age 'cos I propose we adopt him as a pet troll. He's too lame to survive out in the wide wild world, and he is relatively harmless while being occasionally (and so very pompously!) amusing. If we get sick of him or he annoys too many of us we can always "post" him to Kate for one of her gourmet dishes, or to Polly as gator snacks.

(now that mental picture will give me nightmares ROFL)

Goodnight

A FQ is not a body part! My favourite quilting tee shirt!

I was "almost" with you until the last sentence. Then you showed your true colors again. I have to agree that this is just too entertaining to plonk. KJ

You really don't get it. This group is different than any other group on usenet. It follows its own conventions. You either have to adapt or go create your own group. You will NOT be able to make this group conform to whatever you believe it should conform to. You would have far better luck herding cats.

The only bully I see is you. Everyone else here peacefully co-exists. Well, most of the time.

Ms P

A pet troll! What a great idea Cheryl.

You think I'm having guilty pangs!!!! What a laugh. This was the very first time I responded to you idiocies. Also, I have nothing to feel guilty about. And so now you are implying that I am ignorant. Another old saying is, "Takes one to know one." No, Edward, look in the mirror to see "ignorant"! And, yet again, where are your quilting accomplishments? What quilt design are you working on? Show us some pictures. Ask us some quilting questions. Lets keep all of this on topic for the group, shall we??? Everyone knows that I lost my oldest son last year and am making a quilt of parts of his shirts for my daughter-in-law for Christmas this year. But my progress has been halted due to the illness and untimely death of my husband this year and I have moved into an apartment that he and I had planned on sharing. What have you been doing for the last year, Edward, besides harassing this newsgroup??? Marlys in Indiana

Oh, poor gators! Troll hide is rather tough, and Polly's dear creatures are used to nice squishy daft doctors and idiotic dentists!

But I could do a nice troll bread for you...

Would it need regular worming, dusting with flea powder, and anual stabbings for flu, enteritis, and distemper? And how much suntan lotion (factor 95) does it take to stop the thing turning to stone at dawn? I wouldn't want to go to all the trouble of worming, de-fleaing, and pestering the vet for a garden ornament come breakfast time...

I've heard that most trolls are pretty disease resistent so maintenance would be minimal I imagine. However I strongly support responsible pet ownership so I will enquire of my local vet next time I am in.

Of course this also raises the question of whether or not we should have the vet perform that other common procedure for domestic pets. All my cats have been desexed - should Trolls be neutered or would it be enough to just keep him in a strictly confined area? I am assuming the EWT is a "him" of course.

I have done a little research on this and it turns out that if we have a greater northern troll on our hands (the larger variety usually depicted in fairy stories as living in caves) then - yes - the tough hide might have to be removed before gator feeding. However I cannot imagine that we would have too much difficulty collectively (and figuratively!) tearing strips off him if he became really troublesome to us.

On the other hand, the lesser southern troll is much smaller, characterised by a pallid skin colour and rather unpleasant odour (EWT would have to be caged outside!) and reported to be quite tender and tasty. They are usually found lurking under rocks and logs. If the gators develop a taste for troll we could easily round up a few more as they are considered quite stupid and easy to catch. They tend to stick their heads in the sand like ostriches, and then loudly proclaim that as they cannot see you, you cannot see them. Even if you can't smell them, you can usually hear them bellowing mindlessly. Let us hope ETW is a southerner.

BTW - the troll bread sounds nice. Do we need to grind up the troll to mix in the bread or is the troll made into pate and served spread on the fresh bread?

Oh, I hadn't thought of that! Yes... Our cats have also been fixed. I think we need to get him done: it might be hard to re-home a litter of troll-lets. Might also help him not to stink the place up in the breeding season. Anyone know what the breeding season for trolls is?

Wait and see... ;)

mating season is probably in winter when there is less daylight to turn them to stone

I would think that bread would be good. The bones of English men as we know make good bread when ground up for that purpose. I love this man, typical English pedant determined to educate all us poor women, who after all could not possibly be as well educated as such a fine fellow. I don't think he is a Northern or Southern Troll I think he is more likely to be a Midland troll from somewhere interesting like Walsall. He seems to base all his arguments on the convoluted style of the Spaghetti Junction which is very Walsall. I'm so glad we can keep him, he reminds me of my brother. This is why I live in Australia, of course. Ruth, Sydney