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Given up on our quilt group!

OK, just here having a moan, as I have given up going to our local quilting group, can't put up with the "politics" anymore! Grrrrrrr!!!!

OK, so my DM and I are not fluent in French (we can speak it, just not fluent), but we sit and help translate patterns from English to French, we try and join in and help, if we are ever doing anything new, if they want we show/help them with the new technique. But there are 2 women in particular, who are jealous that we know all these techniques, but when living in the UK, we took every class that we could; so they take great joy in trying to belittle us, so that's it, no more. We have French friends that go there and in fact run the group and even they had to step in and defend our language skills, because we don't talk when we are sewing, can't rub stomach and pat head at the same time!

Strange, feel sad and relieved at the same time, I do however, get the feeling that they will merrily all fall out with each other, without us there to be the focus of their sharp tongues! I am sure it has something to do with us volunteering our knowledge with them and not having to pay for our help. One day they can as I would love to run an English Style Tea-room alongside a Patchwork and Quilting Studio........... By the way tea is very trendy in France and more people now drink tea than coffee.

Oh, I feel better now, but there is always someone.......

Janner France

Reply to
Janner
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Yes, there is always someone...

If you miss sewign with others, maybe just invite a few friends (like the ones that run the group) over for an evening. Nothing formal, like setting up a competetive group, just a get-together.

One could suggest all kinds of mental tricks like making those two ladies feel more important than they really are, but it seems like you decided enough is enough, so I won't go there.

Activities that are supposed to be for relaxation, learning and social benifit and are not working towards those - life is too short. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying always bug out at the first sight of trouble, but if the joy no longer overshadows the annoyance/upset, then by all means call it a day!

Hanne in DK

Den 19-09-2012 11:32, Janner skrev:

Reply to
Hanne in DK

"Janner" schrieb im Newsbeitrag news:50599142$0$21947$ snipped-for-privacy@news.free.fr...

Oh, what a pity! But I know how hard it is to leave home. I mean, I only married maybe 20 km from home, but folks here are totally different. If you know more than others - don't let them know. OK, bad joke, but Sharon (mamahays) from alt.sewing has this sig: 'Never try to teach a pig to sing. It's a waste of time and just annoys the pig.' Truer words were never spoken. Well, envy is, more or less, part of our nature but I always tried to curb this feeling. Some folks don't. There's a pat on the back for you. Just carry on doing what you do best you can and grow an elephant's skin against those nasty hags.

Cheer up!

U.

Reply to
Ursula Schrader

I stopped going to the group I found around last Christmas. One woman was always being a bit nasty to everyone, life, etc. One day she turned her attention on me and said I talked about my son too much, he was nothing special, etc. Then proceeded to brag at length about all the things her grandchildren could do. No one spoke up or said anything, just buried their heads in their work. So I guess they all are used to her. I decided to do other things with my time. (!)

-- Jo in Scotland

Reply to
Jo Gibson

Oh, Janner! What a terrible shame! I'm so sorry that you've had to give up what should have been a very pleasant activity. :(

Reply to
Sandy Foster

Reply to
Roberta

Oh yes, everyone looked embarassed, said nothing, heads down and continued to sew. I could see their looks and felt bad for them, as they didn't want to be next on the hit list! There are a few others who have also found excuses to not come anymore, all of them from other parts of the world, let alone France! Same 2 women at the core of that aswell. I have seen something like this before many years ago in the UK, where 2/3 left and set themselves up as a new group, membership by invitation only and no-one invited the problem women!

Thanks, I am sure that something else will happen, as they say when one door shuts another one opens........ I may be put on our board for our archery group, they are mentioning president at the mo, so I may not have time to miss the patchwork group! We are the token English there as well ;)

Janner France

Reply to
Janner

Oh yes, everyone looked embarassed, said nothing, heads down and continued to sew. I could see their looks and felt bad for them, as they didn't want to be next on the hit list! There are a few others who have also found excuses to not come anymore, all of them from other parts of the world, let alone France! Same 2 women at the core of that aswell. I have seen something like this before many years ago in the UK, where 2/3 left and set themselves up as a new group, membership by invitation only and no-one invited the problem women!

Thanks, I am sure that something else will happen, as they say when one door shuts another one opens........ I may be put on our board for our archery group, they are mentioning president at the mo, so I may not have time to miss the patchwork group! We are the token English there as well ;)

Janner France

That is really sad. It kind of seems to be how many groups go. I sat out

4 or so years at the guild I belonged to for like 10 years. Many gals left at about the same time I did. The politics and the fighting was just not fun. I bailed out of the ASG local group for the same reason many years ago. The quilt guild has many new members and the power hungry gals moved away and I recently returned. After a couple of visits I decided to re-join and I am enjoying it. They are building membership again. I really mostly enjoy the friendship group that I have been sewing with all these years. No formal boring meetings, good potlucks and dear friends. Sometimes good comes from the bad. Good luck to you there. Taria
Reply to
Taria

Reply to
Sally Swindells

I miss archery! First tried it when I was 13 - only girl along with 30 boys. I loved it.

I'm trying yoga now. I went to my first class last night and really enjoyed it. I may have found a use for my double-jointedness/hypermobility because I could do all the postures up to the advanced bit and I've never tried this before. I have found I have a rubbish sense of balanace now however... my post-baby body is definitely different!

Next stop, to find a Scottish Country dance group somewhere local we can visit in the evenings. I think I'll continue to just sew by myself though.

-- Jo in Scotland

Reply to
Jo Gibson

Oh yes! Remind them constantly when I win!!!!

As I say " at least I am now firing WITH them and not AT them!"

They are such a good laugh, our motto is "we eat well, we drink well, but fire terribly!" Actually we have a fare number of winners as we have only been competing properly for 3 seasons. Our youngest member is

8 and the eldest is 79, so a great mix across all the generations.

Janner France

Reply to
Janner

Are there no archery groups where you live that you could join in with?

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Janner France

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Janner

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