OT - Holiday Joke

GROAN??? I thought it was hilarious.

GrammyKathy

And here is one from my civil presiding judge - bless his little heart.

Three men are driving home after the holiday party at work. They have a car accident and find themselves standing at the gates of Heaven. St Peter says they will have to show something indicative of the Christmas season in order to enter Heaven.

First guy rummages around in his pocket, produces a Bic lighter and flicks the flame. St Peter says, "What is that supposed to be?" The guy says "It's a Christmas candle". St Peter lets hims in.

Second guy puts his hand in his pocket and starts jangling his loose change. "And what is that?", asks St Peter. "Why, it is sleigh bells", says the man, and he is allowed in.

The third guy is still trying to figure out what he could do. Finally, he pulls a pair of women's underwear out from his inside suit jacket pocket. "And what do you think that has to do with the holiday" demands St Peter. "Well, says the third man, "they're Carol's."

We never did find out if the third guy got into Heaven, we were laughing too hard.

G> It's a romantic full moon, when Pedro said,

The Good Napkins

THE GOOD NAPKINS... ahhhhh... the joys of having Girls...

My mother taught me to read when I was four years old (her first mistake). One day, I was in the bathroom and noticed one of the cabinet doors was ajar.

I read the box in the cabinet. I then asked my mother why she was keeping 'napkins' in the bathroom. Didn't they bel ong in the kitchen?

Not wanting to burden me with unnecessary facts, she told me that those were for "special occasions" (her second mistake).

Now fast forward a few months.... It's Thanksgiving Day, and my folks are leaving to pick up my uncle and his wife for dinner. Mom had her assignments for all of us while they were gone.

Mine was to set the table.

When they returned, my uncle came in first and immediately burst into laughter. Next came his wife who gasped, then began giggling. Next came my father, who roared with laughter.

Then came Mom, who almost died of embarrassment when she saw each place setting on the table with a "special occasion" Kotex napkin at each plate, with the fork carefully arranged on top. I had even tucked the little tail in so they didn't hang off the edge!!

My mother asked me why I used these and, of course, my response sent the other adults into further fits of laughter..

"But, Mom, you said they were for special occasions!!!"

Isn't it easier to just tell the truth?! ????????

Now where can I find something absorbent to clean of my monitor.......

That definitely needed a spew warning, and I really needed that laugh, so thank you for brightening my day :)

Lizzy

Reminds me of the time my mother sent my brother to the store for dinner napkins -- told him to get the biggest ones they had. You guessed it -- he came home with a box of Super Kotex and reported that those were the biggest they had.

Julia > The Good Napkins