Lisa, I can completely understand, on a person level, your regrets with your parents. Please believe that they know how much you love them. I think whatever and whereever they are now, they can feel this and would not want you to dwell on it. You will get a job. Just keep trying. It sounds like you have great experience. Believe in yourself and be patient. Once you get that job it may do a lot to lift your spirits. If you are by yourself a lot right now or not working that is sometimes difficult for those of us you struggle with depression. Blessings and Good Thoughts and strength are coming your way>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> KathyH
Hi All:
> Just when I thought I was getting better, my depression seems to be really
> gathering steam again...pain in the a**.
>
> Yesterday was my birthday, and I went to visit my parents' grave (my dad's
> 80th birthday would have been this Thursday).
>
> Their headstone is a bench, and I just sat there and cried and cried at how
> much I miss them, how bad I was at visiting them, and now that I moved back
> to Boston and have some time to visit, they are not here. That's all they
> ever wanted from me...to visit them. But I was too involved in my life and
> work, and now I have neither.
>
> Additionally, I have decided to try to reenter corporate work, and it's
> tough. I really enjoyed my HR work, and would like to get back into it. My
> network, though, has been in NJ, and so here in MA I really don't have one,
> and in IN where I'd like to move to to be with Matt, I haven't one either. >
> The good news is that I'm seeing a new psychiatrist today, and have an
> appointment to review my resume to ensure that it shows me in my most
> positive light. To think, I spent a worklife doing this for others, but
> find it so hard to do it for myself!!
>
> Thanks for listening all. Off to complete my first task for
today...taking
my shower!!
>
> I know I can, I know I can, I know I can!!!
>
> Lisa
>
>