OT: Cricket VS Baseball

Reply to
Lucille
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"Fred" ,in rec.crafts.textiles.needleworkwrote: and entertained us with

Reply to
lucretia borgia

The ONLY thing I ever enjoyed about cricket was tea in the pavilion at half-time.

Olwyn Mary in New Orleans.

Reply to
Olwyn Mary

And if you'd like to hear/see Pete Seeger perform some of this "rap," go to:

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scroll down to the bottom of the page for a video: Pete Seeger sings "English Is Crazy" Recorded here in 2005, but he's been doing it for years.

enjoy.

Sue

Reply to
Susan Hartman

Thanks Susan. I saw this the other day and I've been wondering since then where I heard it before.

L
Reply to
Lucille

----- Original Message ----- From: "Alison" Newsgroups: rec.crafts.textiles.needlework Sent: Wednesday, July 04, 2007 9:06 AM Subject: Re: OT: Cricket VS Baseball

LAW 1: No matter how bad your last shot was, the worst is yet to come. This law does not expire on the 18th hole, since it has the supernatural tendency to extend over the course of a tournament, a summer and, eventually, a lifetime.

LAW 2: Your best round of golf will be followed almost immediately by your worst round ever. The probability of the latter increases with the number of people you tell about the former.

LAW 3: Brand new golf balls are water magnetic. Though this cannot be proven in the lab, it is a known fact that the more expensive the golf ball, the greater its attraction to water.

LAW 4: Golf balls never bounce off of trees back into play. If one does, the tree is breaking a law of the universe and should be cut down.

LAW 5: No matter what causes a golfer to muff a shot, all his playing partners must solemnly chant "You looked up," or invoke the wrath of the universe.

LAW 6: The higher a golfer's handicap, the more qualified he deems himself as an instructor.

LAW 7: Every par three hole in the world has a secret desire to humiliate golfers. The shorter the hole, the greater its desire.

LAW 8: Topping a 3 iron is the most painful torture known to man.

LAW 9: Palm trees eat golf balls.

LAW 10: Sand is alive. If it isn't, how do you explain the way it works against you?

LAW 11: Golf carts always run out of juice at the farthest point from the clubhouse.

LAW 12: A golfer hitting into your group will always be bigger than anyone in your group. Likewise, a group you accidentally hit into will consist of a football player, a professional wrestler, a convicted murderer and a tax office agent or some similar combination.

LAW 13: All 3 woods are demon possessed.

LAW 14: Golf balls from the same "sleeve" tend to follow one another, particularly out of bounds or into the water (See Law three).

LAW 15: A severe slice is a thing of awesome power and beauty.

LAW 16: "Nice lag" can usually be translated to "lousy putt." Similarly, "tough break" can usually be translated "way to miss an easy one, stupid."

LAW 17: The person you would most hate to lose to will always be the one who beats you.

LAW 18: The last three holes of a round will automatically adjust your score to what it really should be.

LAW 19: Golf should be given up at least twice per month.

LAW 20: All vows taken on a golf course shall be valid only until the sunset.

Fred

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nothing changes, nothing changes.Don't back stitch to email, just stitchit.

Reply to
Fred

No, I was at New Mills Grammar 1954-59. I think the female gym teacher had been rejected by the KGB for being too ruthless.

Reply to
Bruce

"Fred" ,in rec.crafts.textiles.needleworkwrote: and entertained us with

Don't forget, someone (I forget whom) said that golf ruins what would have been a great walk lol

Reply to
lucretia borgia

We had a hard ball for rounders, as I recall.

Pat

Reply to
Pat P

Aren`t all "female" gym teachers like that? Most of ours, upon reflection, were more like transvestites!

Pat

Reply to
Pat P

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