Dear Red States:
>
>
> We've decided we're simultaneously leaving. We intend to form our own
> country, and we're taking the other Blue States with us. In case you
> aren't aware, that includes Hawaii, California, Oregon, Washington,
> Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Illinois, New York, and all of the
> Northeastern states. After this election, we'll be adding Colorado and
> New Mexico. We believe this split will be beneficial to the nation,
> especially to the people of our new country - Nuevo California.
Why in the world would you name it after California? Isn't that a tad bit arrogant? I'll bet the other Blue states won't care much for it.
Why don't you just cut to the chase and proclaim it "Karen's Kountry?"
>
>
> To sum up briefly: You get Texas, Oklahoma and all the slave states; we
> get stem cell research, the best beaches, and the best ski resorts. We
> get the Statue of Liberty; you get Dollywood. We get Intel and
> Microsoft; you get WorldCom. We get Stanford, Harvard, Princeton, Yale,
> Cal Tech, MIT and Columbia; you get Ole' Miss. We get 85 percent of
> America's venture capital and entrepreneurs; you get Alabama. We get
> two-thirds of the tax revenue; you get to make the red states pay their > fair share.
Sooo .... no oil whatsoever for the Blue States????
I hope you have enough cash to invest in all solar heating -- with an average yearly temp in the 60s, the nights'll get a tad chilly.
>
>
> Since our aggregate divorce rate is 22 percent lower than that of the
> Christian Coalition, we get a bunch of happy families and you get a
> bunch of under-educated single moms.
The counties in my state (Florida) that voted predominantly Democratic have the lowest median incomes and the lowest number of college-degree-holders. Also, on average, they also have the highest numbers for living below the poverty line.
So, basically, you're saying that the very people who voted Democratic will be left out in the cold?
Also, aren't those the people that Democrats have been so dedicated to help??????? I thought Dems were famous (and laudably so) for their welfare programs, healthcare initiatives, etc.
I was also under the (apparently foolish) assumption that Dems were champions of ANTI-discrimination??? When did judging someone by the amount of money they make or the amount of higher education they can afford become "Democratic???"
>
>
> Please be aware that Nuevo California will be pro-choice and anti-war,
> and we'll need all of our citizens back from Iraq at once.
I'm not touching that one. Since we've not had a draft since '73, the people that are currently serving in Iraq are "volunteers" -- they've either enlisted in Active Duty or in the Reserves. Both situations are voluntary (though being deployed is obviously not). The possibility of being deployed during war-time is disclosed to potential service-members at the moment of signing on the dotted line.
So what I'm wondering is this:
Do you believe that the US Military sneaked into homes in the middle of the night and conscripted these people?
Do you believe that their names were forged on the enlistment documents?
The bottom line is that even if they only joined for the extra $$ or for the GI Bill (which would be silly considering how hard it is to actually USE in many cases), they VOLUNTEERED knowing full well that so many countries despise us that we WILL get into one fracas or another.
>
> With the Blue States, we will control 80 percent of the country's fresh
> water,90 percent of pineapple and lettuce, 92 percent of the nation's
> fresh fruit, 97percent of America's quality wines (you can serve French
> wines at your state dinners), 90 percent of all cheese, 90 percent of
> the high tech industry, most of the U.S. low-sulfur coal, all living
> redwoods, sequoias and condors, and all the Ivy League and Seven Sister
> schools. We also get New England, the Great Lakes and Yosemite, thank > you very much.
You also get the highest crime rates. Congrats. Be sure to mention the niceties you cite above to the next serial murderer or armed robber you meet.
>
>
> In the Red States, you will have to cope with 88 percent of all obese
> Americans and their projected health care costs, 92 percent of all U.S.
> mosquitoes, 100 percent of tornadoes, 94 percent of hurricanes, 99
> percent of Southern Baptists, virtually 100 percent of all
> televangelists, and Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, Bob Jones University, > and Clemson.
You go ahead and enjoy those earthquakes! And the smog. Don't forget the smog.
>
>
> Additionally, in the Red States, 38 percent actually believe Jonah was
> swallowed by a whale; 62 percent believe life is sacred unless it
> involves the death penalty or gun ownership; 44 percent claim that
> evolution is only a theory; 53 percent insist that Saddam Hussein was
> involved in 9/11; and 61 percent of you crazy bastards believe you have
> higher moral standards than those of us on the left.
Apparently, if you're an example, they may not be more "morally upright" than you, but according to your statements about "under-educated single moms" (most of which, I'll bet, of which are minorities -- since they typically don't have the resources for higher education -- raising a child alone does cost substantial funds), they can at least say that they're not as discriminatory as you are.
>
>
> By the way, we're taking all the good pot, too. You get that dirt weed
> from Mexico and Kansas ditches.
Apparently the good cocaine, too! ;)
>
>
> Peace out,
>
> The Blue States
If your discriminatory spews are any indicator (and I think they are), you're about as "Blue" as Bush!!! Try walking the talk, not just blabbering on about it.
I hope against all hope that your post was a failed attempt at humor. If not, don't be surprised if our party disowns you. I think even Obama would be horribly ashamed at your post. Horribly.