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OT: Language Warning :Things a Stressed Woman Might Say

THINGS A STRESSED WOMAN MAY SAY AT WORK

  1. Well, this day was a total waste of make-up.

**2. Okay, okay! I take it back. Unfuck you.

**3. You say I'm a bitch like it's a bad thing.

  1. Well, aren't we a goddamn ray of sunshine?

  2. Don't bother me, I'm living happily ever after.

  1. Do I look like a people person?

  1. This isn't an office. It's hell with fluorescent lighting.

  1. I started out with nothing and I still have most of it left.

  2. Therapy is expensive. Popping bubble wrap is cheap. You choose.

  1. Why don't you try practicing random acts of intelligence and senseless acts of self-control?

  2. I'm not crazy. I've been in a very bad mood for 30 years.

  1. Sarcasm is just one more service I offer.

  2. Do they ever shut up on your planet?

*14. I'm not your type. I'm not inflatable.

*15. Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you haven't gone to sleep yet!

  1. Back off!! You're standing in my aura.

  2. Don't worry. I forgot your name too.

  1. I work 45 hours a week to be this poor.

*19. Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.

  1. Wait ... I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.

  2. Chaos, panic and disorder ... my work here is done.

*22. Ambivalent? Well, yes and no.

  1. You look like shit. Is that the style now?

  1. Earth is full. Go home.

  2. Aw, did I step on your poor little itty bitty ego?

*26. I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly alert.

***27. A hard-on doesn't count as personal growth.

  1. You are depriving some village of an idiot.

*29. If assholes could fly, this place would be an airport.

  1. Look deeply into my eyes ... Do you see one ounce of give-a-shit?

Reply to
elspeth
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LOL... Good ones. Many I've seen before, and there are some new ones now clamoring to be placed in the back of my badge for work. I call it my billboard. New candidates forthcoming... Thanks! Debi

Reply to
Debi Matlack

Lol - loved them. Here is another one for you: "I've only got one damn nerve left, and your getting on it." Gosh I don't miss a job any more. I'm sure the last year I worked that I was capable of saying at least one of those a day - and that was on a good day at the office!

Sherry Starr

Reply to
Sherry Starr

The sad part is - you don't have to work in an office to "be able to say" these things! There are a couple that I'm storing in my brain for my DH and DSs!!!! Whoever said being a SAHM was easy?!?!?!?

Sue > Lol - loved them. Here is another one for you: "I've only got one damn

Reply to
Sue DiNapoli

Let's not forget Jo Dee Messina's contribution

**My Give A Damn's Broken**

elspeth wrote:

Reply to
gyrlcentric

oops

**My Give A Damn's Busted!**

gyrlcentric wrote:

Reply to
gyrlcentric

a man going off to work all day

Reply to
Jessamy

"Jessamy" wrote in news:44ba0653$0$74898$ snipped-for-privacy@news.wanadoo.nl:

Spew warning next time please.... come clean off my monitor

Reply to
Jan

sure I'll come on over to clean the monitor! just send me the ticket;-)

anyway I was speaking from personal experience.. my ex always said I did nothing - now he has a place of his own and has found out the hard way how much mess 2 kids can make in 24 hours - it takes him *all* week to tidy up after the kids have been for their weekly 24 hour stay

Reply to
Jessamy

"Jessamy" wrote in news:44ba3c2e$0$96361$ snipped-for-privacy@news.wanadoo.nl:

Yeah, I find it's not just limited to men though ;-) I've been known to just hand my hubby the kid and walk out the door for 2 or 3 hours of shopping leaving a list behind of what needs to be done by that time.... like dinner on, please switch laundry... nothing big. I usually get treated very nice after one of those outings.. and I get to shop Yesterday we had a change to the morning routine, and DD does not do change.... meltdowns left and right with a realtor and serious lookers due in early, DH melted down right beside her over her melt down.... was so very helpful.....

Reply to
Jan

akkk *men*

but what a grand idea of yours to keep your DH in the correct reality with the small chores to be done! :-)

Reply to
Jessamy

Thank you for the giggles. Duly passed on to sister and friends...

Reply to
Kate Dicey

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