today and Bolivia

Maybe "getting away" would give Larissa the break she needs to better cope and help her children/family. None of us are in a position to say she is doing right or wrong because what is right for her and her family may be wrong for you and your family.

You know, it doesn't matter where you go, there are dangers everywhere. Does that mean we'll all be hiding in our houses afraid to even poke our nose through the curtains? No. I think it is fantastic that Larisa is so moved to do something like this! I'd do it if I was in shape to do so, but I know my limitations. I know that God works in mysterious ways, and leads us to our callings. Some of us know what those are, some of us are still waiting to find out what He has in store (I'm one of those waiting, but I know from all the health issues over the last several years and that the nephrologist was shocked when the kidneys went into remission, God isn't done with me yet!). It isn't like she's the sole provider for her 2 kids. She's got someone to fall back on for when she's gone. Why not let her do what she feels called to do and not be negative about it? I think she needs moral support, not bickering over who said what and what they might have meant!

Tigg (stepping down off the soap box and donning asbestos underwear.)

It's not out of character at all. A few years ago I disagreed with Ms. Vann and she responded by telling me I needed to get laid more. Yes, quite a Christian thing to do. Ms.Vann continually posts every detail of her train-wreck of a life, looking for attagirls and poor Larissas. When she doesn't get the praise she thinks she deserves, she turns nasty. This has been going on for years, and I'm sick of it. I kill-filed her long ago, but it's impossible to kill the threads she spawns. I think I'm done with this group and whoever is in charge of Frapper can remove my pin. A lot of you folks (not all, but some) are not as nice as you like to think.

Bye - unsubscribing.

Iris

I apologize for getting involved in this; this is none of my business.

Gen: Neither you nor Jo have said anything in this thread that is unkind or offensive. You both spoke politely and plainly. FWIW, I want you both to know how I viewed your posts. Don't forget, when mousing isn't enough, filters are fantastic.

Let's move on! PAT in VA/USA

I wouldn't be afraid to go anywhere in the world, but if I was primary caretaker of 2 children who needed constant attention, I would have to re-think my priorities.

Her DH has a full time job and by her own admission has never been one to just pitch right in there. I've never heard mention of anyone who takes the children and gives her a break. Who's gonna watch these kids for her while she's gone?

I hope it works out for her.

Cindy

Oh, please. You asked for opinions and you got some and they weren't all the validations that you wanted. And as far as her "knowing you", you bare your life's details with abandon on this newsgroup. So, yeah. We know you. Way more than we wanted to.

Giving heart, my ass, you're a nasty little piece. Into the killfile you go. I won't learn anything quilty from you and I already know how to whine.

And just so you know? There are lots of folks who go through far more than "poor little you". They just dont' go on and on about it.

Every NG that I have been on that is dominated by women has always had this problem. There are so many nurturing people that they can't see what they are doing to the group by constantly babying someone like this.

And what kind of person constantly need this validation from people they don't even know? Possibly, those who have plumb wore out the people that they do know.

On second thought, I'm not killfiling you. I'm just going. I've had it. I'm already in email contact with the swaps I am involved in, so I won't miss anything. More time to sew.

There. Now someone has really been mean and you have a reason to whine. But it's time to put on the big girl panties and get on with your life.

Cindy

Cindy, if things fall into place that I would be going, it would include the fact that my parents are moving in with us and are NOT going to be working outside the home for a while. *IF* they were to be able and willing ot watch them, that would be one of the pieces falling into place. If not, than things didn't fall into place for me to go.

You know, I've been sitting here thinking about something Iris said about how Larisa posts everything about her life looking for "attagirls" or "poor Larissa's". I don't think I'm the only one guilty of posting about what's going on in my life. I know Larisa wasn't looking for anything other than a little feedback, some moral support while she wrestled with this decision. I know that I've used the newsgroup as my support group when I was sick and again when the ex hit me with "I want a divorce". I don't remember anyone telling me that I shouldn't do that here. I've always thought of us as a family and, while all families bicker over stuff eventually, have never had a response to anything like has gone on here. I don't remember many flame wars going on here because someone posted something about their lives that they needed support going through. What makes me wonder is why now? We all know that we don't always agree, what family does? But you can disagree without resorting to name calling, or deciding to take your bucket and go home, right? Disagreement is one way we learn new ideas and how we show that we are individuals. None of us think exactly the same way. If we all did, we wouldn't be human, but robots. I know first hand that it is easy to get your feelings hurt when someone writes something that comes across as negative. I've been there. Maybe Iris didn't mean to sound so condescending in her original post, or maybe it was read with a tone that wasn't intended to be there. I know when I read her original post to Larisa's first post about this, I read it with a tone too. I don't expect us to all get along all the time, what family does that? But when you belong to a newsgroup like this, you get to where you take the good with the bad. If you don't like a specific person, then don't read the threads they start. If you aren't interested in reading off topic posts (yeah, I know, some of us forget to put OT in the header), don't read them. If a specific technique isn't your cup of tea, skip it. I don't read every topic. I can't sit here all day long, day in and day out and try to keep up with absolutely everything (ok, so I don't have that much else to do, but I do have a dog who gets upset when I spend too much time on the computer, as I've done in the last few days). We all have lives outside of this newsgroup, but we also share our lives with our friends and family here. I don't think Larisa should be excluded from being able to do that, nor should Iris. Now, they've decided to leave which is their decisions but to have something that started out as "hey, I feel that I'm being called to do this and want some feedback" to turn into something that starts slurring her character is uncalled for. I don't think any of us can say we aren't guilty of looking for a little positive reinforcement when life sets up hurdles or when we are making huge decisions in our lives.

Tigg (had to get that off my chest. Sorry if it's rambling or doesn't made sense.)

My husband is from Colombia and we visited there in 2001 with our two small children. Throughout our entire time there I felt safe and secure. As with every place you go, there are good areas and bad areas

- and, living fairly close to NYC, I've learned that quite well ;)

Kristie

That is what I was thinking. My daughter interviewed for a Teaching Assistant job through her University, supervising study abroad students in Bolivia.

L>or would you be scared going anywhere in south america?

and then theres folks like us, diana. tis beyond me what we are all about. :) cheers, jeanne

You expressed a bit more strongly what I would have liked to say. I've seen this happen to so many groups of which I've been a part, whether in cyberspace or in real space. We get together for a purpose and the people come in and start going on and on about personal problems. Introductory prayer time becomes more like an ameteur "Dr. Phil" hour. Pretty soon, the quality to noise ratio is so out of balance that those who are truly interested in the topic leave and we're left with mostly noise.

We all have personal problems and challenges and there are support groups for almost every one that you can name. We shouldn't turn these groups into our own version of Monty Python's "The Four Yorkshiremen."

Exactly. "Cup? You had a cup? We used to have to drink out of a rolled up newspaper."

heehee. level 33???? the bad religion/against the grain 'words'. got any hints? never heard of them so have no idea which direction to think for this one. sigh... jeanne Are we about something Jeanne? Oh, yes, enabling peoples dreams. And

Sorry, but now I have to throw in my two cents worth too,

totally uncalled for. This was just above and beyond uncalled for.

That's just sad, Tina