Re: Things we do in public

The "Dutch Uncle" Speaks:

Mothers deserve to eat out sometimes. Kids need the experience of eating out sometimes. They need to see how society works.

People have enjoyed great food and conversation in busy and noisy family environments for a very long time. A busy and noisy environment does not preclude a great food experience.

It takes a village to raise a child. There was a time when some village helped to raise you. (I certainly made some great messes in restaurants.) And, now it is payback time. While you and that child are in the same restaurant, you are a part of that child's village. A smile from you, or a little game played at a distance with facial expressions may be all that is needed to get the child to stop fussing. At the very least, you can set an example of tolerance and good manners.

Having kids around while you are dinning, is not nearly as bad as eating alone.

Aaron

Tamar, my viewpoint was more about the comfort of the baby and the kids than that their noise bothered me. Nobody was a winner in that setup. The two mothers constantly were yelling at the whining little ones, the baby while being fed, was restless, and the mothers cranky. Not much of a time out for anyone. There must be other ways to get away from it all. We used to pool baby sitting, with my last child. That would give one mother a change to get out and away from it all, I would return the favor the next week for an afternoon. I still believe that newborn babies should not be lugged everywhere. But like I said, I may be the odd man (sorry woman...LOL) out. I also knew that I needed a rest as well when the baby (ies) were sleeping, it was my time out. I would take a bath, nap, or read a book. Must be honest, we never had the money either to go to a restaurant (different times I guess)

Els

In article , wrote:

Aaron there is a time and a place for everything..... As far as I could see, there was lots of unhappiness and very little learning going on at that table. Mothers yelling at you to sit up straight and stop whining, and eat your food, is not my kind of lets share a family meal out. Sorry can't see anything positive there. In this instant I would say that I was tolerant enough. I certainly did not complain in the restaurant, to the staff or mothers. Indeed I did try the funny faces, and friendly talk, going down in a yoga squat next to the unhappy little ones. All I got for trying was a nasty stare from the mother, and more crying from the child. In all fairness to the other folks at the restaurant, nobody complained and we all took it in our stride. Sorry Aaron, these four little kids (never mind the baby) were not having a good time at all. If you want a village setting, where everyone is going to be involved, it should maybe be at a potluck lunch, or a family gathering. A neighbourhood club of some sort, I can see that right away. You can bring your baby carriage and someone will look after the baby while you chat with your friends or family. The kids are part of that setup, with games, and running around. These mothers were not at all looking after the interest of their 4 little ones, the kids were in short a royal pain in the but to them. I just thought that they were all missing the boat. Like I said, there is a time and a place for everything.

Els

Yes, they do. Preferably without the rug rats.

They need to learn at home first.

I'm long past raising children, and that's precisely why when I want a nice dinner out, it is NOT at a "family" restaurant. I go to a restaurant where they don't supply kiddie seats, or crayons and paper.

I beg to differ. I'd rather eat alone than put up with crying kids/babies. Eating alone can be very peaceful.

Shelagh the Grump

Right! Keith gets upset sometimes when little kids are running around, but I tell him that this is their time, too. We have not taken little kids to "fancy" restaurants, but more to the Swiss Chalet type, which cater to families.

Higs, Katherine

Excellent response, Els, and I totally agree. I believe in bringing children wherever I can, but there are times when it is just not appropriate.

Higs, Katherine

LOL No, you're not!

Higs, Katherine

kids/babies.

Shelalgh, I so very much agree with you! Like millions of other people, I live alone and eat most of my meals alone. I don't know why anyone would think eating alone is bad unless you can't stand your own company. LOL

Jan you are so right, but non of us told you that there was knitting going on during all of this.....LOL

Els

Aah Jan, we have a lot of off topic discussions on this group, and very few people seem to mind. It would have probably been more on etiquette if the person who started the thread had put "OT" in the subject, but try not to get too upset about it. ;>)

Shelagh

Shelagh,

I totally agree with you (not about the grump part :P ). I've always enjoyed eating alone and have had many friends tell me they could never do that. Their thoughts were along the line of people thinking they couldn't find anyone to eat with. Those types of thoughts never enter my mind. Alone, I can go eat where and when I want without having to compromise. I can indulge my taste for my favorite Indian restaurant on a whim.

I can't imagine denying myself a simple pleasure because of what strangers may think....

BB

Don't worry, I'm not upset as it really doesn't bother me. But I just wanted to point it out for the sake of others who want to see posts marked OT when appropriate.

BB wrote in news:mcw8g.34021$ snipped-for-privacy@tornado.ohiordc.rr.com:

it appears that going out to eat alone has some kind of stigma, at least in the US, and *especially* if you are a lone female (although i have an SO in NYC & he nearly always arranges lunch/dinner with another single friend so neither is 'alone'). lee