Y'all have had so much fun discussing dessert (misspelled on porpoise) island stiching that I thought I'd pose another question.
If, in addition to be a stitcher, you were also an inventor or had access to wizard, what stitching thingies would you create?
I'd love a hand cream that not only works. It could be slathered on and wouldn't transfer to anything else.
I have just the thing for you. It is Arbonne Intelligence hand cream. I have a tube as well as a pump jar. Once you apply it, it will still be there no matter how many times you get your hands in water. Can't remember prices etc., but my niece sells it. It is expensive but I have been using the tube for a year and the pump jar for about as long. Frances
A way to listen/watch a show that I want to stitch to while the kids watch Sponge Bob!
Thanks for the suggestion.
What would you wish for?
I would like a gizmo that would put my project away for me at night. It should be either folded or covered and placed neatly in its designated resting place, with the threads in proper order and everything needed for the project in the same general place. It would then stay there until it needs to come out and play again.
Lucille
Such a gizmo already exists -- it's called a wife.
And oh boy do we need one of those in this household!
Elizabeth
Good idea but I'm too old to want to be bothered dealing with another human being in my house. Plus, I would probably be unlucky enough to get a wife like I was and I will readily admit it couldn't have been easy to live with me
Gee, I wonder if I could train my dog to do the job?
Lucille
Nah. He has a wife, why would he want to be one?
Elizabeth
No--He doesn't have a wife. He has a full staff of slaves, including a butler, a valet, a lady-in-waiting, an upstairs and downstairs maid and a cook.
ROFL!
Elizabeth
I like that a lot. I've always called him CP Puff, short for Crown Prince. This sounds even better.
Lucille
All good ideas. I'm pretty happy with a couple of hand creams that we've used in the shop - in particular "Sew Help Me" - doesn't smell particularly, and is thick, but goes in quickly, and doesn't come off on the threads. Also, I use the Crabtree & Evelyn Hand Therapy - Goat's Milk. Do the scrub stuff about 2x a week, and the cream a lot - but it works well, and I can stitch immediately, and it lasts a long time (don't use much, and it also doesn't have to be reapplied too often).
The clean-up idaa - awesome. But what I want is an automatic thread cutter & stripper. Then I could just pluck up and put together the strands I need. I hate plying thread all the time.
Ellice
When you find that one, please put me right at the top of the list.
Lucille
I would like a magical thread that automatically inserts itself straight off the (prewound) bobbin and then elongates to whichever length of it I need. In this way, I would never have to suffer 'stitcher's angst': the feeling you get when there's an inch of stitching left and only half an inch of usable thread on your needle.
Does everyone remember a hundred years ago when Nan was going to compile a Stitcher's Glossary? I submitted 'stitcher's angst' along with:-
'visceral pincushion': place in which to insert needle while temporarily out of use. Usually responsible for acute needle-stick injury to the thigh, nose, mammary tissue or spouse of the stitcher.
'stitcher's glamour': the colourful aura permanently associated with all who stitch. Composed of ethereal particles called 'orts'. These 'orts' attach themselves irrevocably to every exposed (and some not) part of the stitcher's body and vestments. The stitcher is thus 'branded' as such and can be recognised by another stitcher a mile off!
'stitcher's chagrin': the enlightenment immediately following discovery of a lost needle in upholstered furniture.
depauperation: the phenomenon of having less thread on one's bobbin than one will require to complete a project.
stitcher's moue: the facial expression of a stitcher when first casting her eye on her finished and framed project.
stitcher's squint: ritual facial contortion used by stitchers when ceremonially threading a needle.
'stitcher's little helper': a magnifying glass. Some scholars disagree, pointing out that the 'dololly' (artefact from the early nineties) had a more utilitarian purpose.
'ejector button': no.26 tapestry needle buried point-upward in upholstered furniture.
'surreptitious': a stitcher who manages to peek at the back of someone else's project without appearing to have done so.
'stitcher's grin': gap-toothed smile of a stitcher who has been given a retractable scissors fob for Christmas.
'bottomless pit': a workbasket.
'stitcher's shriek': sound emerging from the throat of a stitcher who has suddenly realised she miscounted by just one thread.
'anguish': emotional response of a stitcher who has twenty dollars in her purse when the chart costs twenty-one dollars.
There's more, but I can't remember where I put them. I wonder whether Nan had any other replies? Matter of fact, I wonder how Nan is! She used to have an Irish Wolfhound...
In which case, I need one.
C
I know Bobbie has one and I covet one - an automatic needle threader. But I want it for my sewing machine.
C
I have one just for ordinary needles that Aya bought for me when we were at a big Shinto shrine in Tokyo. It is a neat little gizomo; the problem is that the instructions are all in Japanese. We bought the last one he had. I haven't used it, but value it greatly!
G
Thanks for the seriously funny trip down memory lane!
Donna in Virginia
I'd create a machine that slows time waaaaaay down when stitching so I could get more done! The three hours I spent stitching would only count as about 3 minutes in real time. Just think.....our SABLE would be all stutch up, which would let us go out and buy more! :)
That and something to make framing much cheaper!
Joan
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