My big brother flew helicopter rescue in Vietnam and been discharged when his vision went wonky. It was never clear whether he had MS or neurological damage from Agent Orange, but he lived with it, slowly deteriorating physically and emotionally, for over 40 years. Tender, oppositional, sweet and sometimes cruel, shaped by illness and tragedy and so very many losses, he tended to drive away those he most loved. It wasn't until last year that I realized I really owed him a QOV. So, I made the quilt. Then had an awful time with the label. Kept redoing it, because I wanted it to look right. Months went by, and I got a call. He was slipping badly. I flew to Atlanta with the quilt, the last iteration of the label sewn in. I gave it to him, and read the label to him, but I don't know whether he was able to see it or understand. He passed away the next morning, January 30.
I'm thankful to have had those six hours alone with him.. I forgave him and apologized for any part I'd had in our estrangement. As did, I believe, his children. I know he knows I was there and I know he is at peace, but I wish I would have done it long before.
His son has the quilt now, and seemed deeply honored to receive it. I pray it will be a lesson for us all.
--Heidi