I've been feeling worse and worse over the past couple of months -- unable to get out of bed a few days. Fevers most days. Pain levels up
-- normal stuff but worse. And the fatigue has become way, way out of control.
It's a long story, but the short of it is that I'm going back on Prednisone today -- 60 mg for several days and then tapering down to
10 by the end of 12 days and then staying at 10.I was on the stuff 4.5 years and hated every second. I had a "buffalo hump" at the base of my neck. I finally weaned off it almost a year ago. But now I've hit a real wall and there you go -- right back on the nasty stuff. What it does is subdue my raging immune system.
Now, the only thing I've been really successful at the last few months is gaining weight. More than 20 pounds since last summer. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr. I look horrible. And prednisone makes you gain weight. If you go on a fast with only water for nourishment, you're gonna gain 25 pounds.
So I'm moaning. I was always a thin person until I got too sick to get out and move around. And got put on a bunch of meds that all put weight on you. Now I'm "fluffy" and it looks awful and I can't wear any clothes and I feel soooooooooooo ugly. No, I don't find other fluffy women ugly. Just me. And I feel like my husband can't stand the way I look, even though he says otherwise. Let's get real.
As a result of all the above I'm feeling pretty bad. Shaking from the prednisone and craving food. Any food. The dog kibble looks pretty good. Except for those unkind stomach cramps. And I feel bad about myself in every way possible.
I'm having a hard time reading the past week. Can't really make it work for more than a few mins at a time. I don't know if I'll be around for awhile, but I do love all of you and want you to know I'm praying and sending good thoughts and all that. I will post the baby quilt I'm finishing in the new few days and my bed quilt that I'm long- arming next week. I need a life so I'm putting photos up when I can.
Hugs to all -- Larisa, do let me hear about Tom's medical results! Sunny