Susan and other Hug participants
I thankyou you for all your work on the Tyler Hug. I was honoured to participate and would not have been offended if my block had not been included, and would certainly never have asked for it to be returned. I did not sign my block as it was a gift that required no acknowledgement.
Perhaps in future the people who want their blocks returned to them if they are not included in the quilts should make that clear and include a return envelope with their block. The phrasing of the request to return the blocks in question was - to say the least - insensitive. The decision of one individual to forward a quilt in the name of the group because she apparently did not consider our group response quick enough was also - IMVHO - a tiny bit mean spirited as it implied that our efforts were not satisfactory. I had understood that blocks from the Tyler hug that were not included in his quilt would go to HM Figaro. I would have been happy to see my block so used, but have now been denied the opportunity to contribute to this second quilt. As a retired military person (albeit from another country) I would like to have done so. And I sincerely hope that this comment will not lead to a further outpouring as I in no way question the wonderful sentiments behind the gesture of the second quilt.
I am new to the hug list and would love to continue to participate, but I do not give gifts with strings. I have just offered to participate in the latest hug request but am now uncertain as I do not wish to become embroiled in this sort of exchange. The quilters who offer to host a hug do so voluntarily and give generously of their time and resources. I am not in a position to do this and I am grateful to all of them for the enormous amount of work they do and for the opportunity they give me to contribute sometimes in small ways I can manage.
If there are rules about hugs I would like to know what they are so I can make an informed decision about whether I can accept them. I have read all the posts on this subject and am now left with the feeling that long-term hug participants may have expectations or assumed knowledge that I do not have. If there are "traditions" or rules, please do not assume that everyone knows them unless they are sent out with each and every hug request.
I have seen that some of the hug quilts have been enormous to accommodate all the blocks sent, and can only repeat my very tentative (and promptly rejected) comments when the size of Tyler's quilt was being discussed in an earlier post. An enormous may be treasured, but may not necessarily be a practical blessing to the recipient. If you want to include a lot of blocks, might I humbly suggest that the host ask for smaller blocks. I personally could not use an enormous quilt. I could not lift it, or wash it, and I have nowhere to display it. Tyler and HM Figaro will have problems even packing a normal sized quilt. The intention behind making an enormous quilt is wonderful, but I still believe that agreement on some size limitation would be more practical.
When I give a quilt I hope to see it used and worn out, and I certainly do not place conditions on my gifts. I have seen my quilts finish up as dog bedding, and it hasn't worried me. I might think twice about hand appliquing the recipient another quilt, but it would not cause me to comment to them or anyone else, and I would not be hurt. Nor would it stop me giving them another quilt in future. My gift was meant to give pleasure, and they may adore their dog! Other people may - indeed probably do - have different views.
(I just got such a quilt back for "repairs" from a single male friend. He has no wife or mother to care for his quilt and it is showing definite signs of wear and tear. I also suspect that his beloved dog may be allowed to sleep on it sometimes, judging from it's appearance. It cost me considerable time and effort to make this quilt and I am thrilled to see it so used, and I was touched that he was so anxious to get it repaired and returned. I intend to repair it, wash it and send it back to be further abused - and loved! And when it falls apart if I can still sew I will replace it.)
Susan, I sent my block to you to be used as you saw fit. I did not attach any conditions to my gift.
If there are rules that imply conditions I would like to know what they are as I might not agree with them and will therefore have to decline to take part in future hugs.
In the meantime - thankyou so very much Susan for making such a beautiful quilt for Tyler. I don't know him or his mother but my best wishes went with my block to them, and I think the wishes are more important than the block. I would happily participate in any Hug you hosted in future and would fully expect you to use any blocks I sent as you saw fit, subject only to the NG's Hug rules allowing this.
I will now wait to see what the rules are before sending more hug blocks.