I created this recipe today for Lammy. Hope you all like it!
Lammy's Pumpkin Ginger Muffins by Lammy's Mommy
2 c. all-purpose flour
1 1/2 tsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp. baking soda
1/2 tsp. sea salt
1 Tbsp. ground cinnamon
1 tsp. freshly grated nutmeg
1/2 tsp. ground ginger
2 Large Eggs
2 c. pumpkin puree
1/3 c. Canola Oil
2 tsp. vanilla extract
1 1/4 c. buttermilk
1/3 c. crystallized ginger, chopped
3/4 c. sugar
Sift together flour, baking soda, baking powder, salt, cinnamon, nutmeg and ground ginger. In a separate bowl, whisk together eggs, pumpkin, oil, vanilla and buttermilk. Pour wet ingredients into dry ingredients and stir until just mixed. Stir in crystallized ginger. Evenly distribute batter into 12 muffin cups. Bake at 350 for 20 minutes or until a knife inserted in the center of a muffin comes out clean.
Oh, they're just fine, Nora! Cadence prefers to sleep while strapped to mommy, and Lammy is full of pumpkin muffins. :) But just as a general question thrown out to all moms who have ever had a two year old...how do you deal with the tantrums, sleep fighting, and not listening to mom (it's driving me crazy!)?
I saw one of the Food Channel chefs (not Emeril) make Stuffing Muffins one day last week. Added some diced apples to a stuffing recipe and made stuffing muffins for easier serving. I'd never heard of that before - has anyone in the group ever done this? I think I'll try it for the next holiday.....
The sleep fighting sometimes means they're over tired and should be going to bed a bit earlier or maybe taking a longer nap. I would put her to bed with a favorite toy, telling her that she has to stay in her bed; she can play quietly if she likes, but she can't call mommy until the sun comes back tomorrow morning. The first few nights, I might return to remind her firmly that mommy can't come to get her until the morning, but I would refuse to discuss anything else. Be as boring as you can possibly be.
The "not listening to mom" depends. First, keep the rules to a minimum. Only forbid things that you're going to be willing to take a stand on, because if later you decide it's not worth it, you've taught your kid that sometimes you mean what you say and sometimes you don't. Once you've told a child they can't do something, you have to make sure they don't succeed in doing it. Remove them from the scene, or take the object away from them and put it out of their reach, or whatever is necessary to make them resist from the forbidden behaviour. Never repeatedly tell a child to do or not do something without following through to make sure your instructions were followed. This may cause a tantrum, see below.
If it's something you've told them they have to do, such as put down their book and leave the library, then you have to make sure they do it, even at the cost of physically carrying them off. Never ask a child's advice or consent to something they have to do. It's dishonest to pretend it's their choice if it isn't. I used to see parents saying, "Let's leave the playground now and go to the supermarket." The kid's reaction is surely going to be, "Let's not." Instead say, "I have to go shopping now. We can come back here another day." It's a good idea to give a two-minute warning, but once you've said it's time to go, don't allow delays.
My oldest daughter occasionally had tantrums. You have to totally ignore the supposed casis belli, other than to state your position firmly just one time: "No, you cannot watch TV now. It's out of the question." "You cannot have your hammer if you use it to hit the table." Once the tantrum is under way, don't bring up that subject again. Just totally ignore the screaming, kicking, breath-holding little creature.
If it goes on too long and it's getting on your nerves, you can treat the tantrum as an unfortunate occurrence, maybe like a bump on the head. I used to say to my daughter, "You really are feeling bad just now, aren't you?" Then I would get a damp washcloth and hold her in my lap and hold it on her forehead for a minute, saying, "Maybe this will make you feel better." If she still screamed, I would say, "I think you need to rest in your crib until you feel better." Then I would put her gently in her crib and say, "Call me when you're feeling better." and leave the room.
This worked very well. Alone in her crib with no attention at all given to her tantrum, she generally recovered almost instantly. When we were out, if she had a tantrum, I had only to say, "When we get home, I'll let you rest in your crib for a few minutes and you'll feel better." Then I would totally ignore the shenanigans unless she was beginning to damage property or persons." In that case, or if it was a place where noise was inappropriate, I would take her outside, saying, "We can't stay here while you're making so much noise/throwing things around. It's annoying the other people." I also used to tell my kids when we went into a place where noise was inappropriate, "This is a very grownup place. You have to be very grownup to come in here."
The key is to remain completely calm and unemotional and not to discuss the matter that caused the tantrum. Kids learn quickly that the tantrum achieves absolutely nothing, and doesn't even get them any attention.
Two year olds want very much to have a little autonomy, It helps a lot to give them some autonomy in things that are appropriate. In other words, it's not their choice whether to have a bath or not, but you can give them a choice of the pink soap or the yellow soap. They can't wear their shorts to school in January, but you can take out two appropriate outfits and ask them which one they want to wear.
My Mom told me that my older sister threw temper tantrums and would hold her breath. She told the doctor who told her to wait until Carol's face was turning blue/ very bright red and then throw a bucket of cold water over her. Worked like a charm! She was shocked into breathing, and she NEVER did it again, or even threatened to.
Matthew started up ONCE in a store where I had intended to buy him a couple of hooded sweatshirts. He took off to the toy aisle when my back was turned. I brought him back to the sweatshirts and he proceeded to start yelling like I was killing him. I emptied the cart back to where the items belonged, took a yelling Matthew by the hand and walked him out of the store.... with him crying and yelling "I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" the whole way. When we got to the car, I strapped him into his carseat and told him.... "If you hadn't behaved the way you did I was going to buy you some sweatshirts and a toy... now, you get nothing at all. Maybe you won't behave that way anymore now." He didn't!
My kids only had tantrums once or twice each, because they realized it didn't do them any good. If we were out, we went back to the car and they were put in the back seat to thrash around and scream for as long as it took for them to stop. I usually had a newspaper or a book with me to read. If we were at home, they were put in their crib and I closed the bedroom door and let them scream. Ignoring it is the only way.
I love my kids dearly....but when they were little they never ruled my life, I ruled theirs. Remember the old saying "You do it because I said so"... or "because I'm the Mom".
I don't believe in pussy footing around with kids. If they think they've gotten the upper hand.... you're toast. Being firm but loving also means better behaved kids. ;>)
Oh you bet! When Matthew grabbed on to a *choice* word at the tender age of two, *just* before meeting his paternal grandparents for the first time (My Dad had hit his thumb with a hammer and didn't know Matthew was *right* behind him)... I tried everything I could think of to stop him from saying it. The more attention he got, the more he said it. However... he did not take to being ignored (this was a bad word, mind you, not the temper tantrum which I explained this morning), and even though my Mom and I put our newspapers up in front of our faces to show him that we were not listening... he proceeded to come stand beside me, lean in and put his face directly in front of mine in front of the newspaper and repeated the word loud and clear as if to say "IGNORE THAT!" It was shortly after that when I discovered the Tabasco Sauce and put a tiny dot on his tongue and sat him on the stairs and shut the door behind me to leave him sit there alone. It only took a couple of times and it worked like a charm... he stopped saying the word..... until the first day he met his paternal grandparents, then out it came again (a new audience). I took him by the hand, walked him into the livingroom, put the dot of tabasco sauce on his tongue and shut the stairs door behind me to let him cry and yell.
Only problem with that was, when I turned around my ex-mother-in-law was standing right there and told me I was a cruel mother and shouldn't have the child to raise. My hackles went up, and I told her off in no uncertain terms "This is MY child that YOUR son chose to abandon, therefore I am raising him on my OWN! I live here with my parents and they have NEVER interferred in the raising of my child, so what makes you think you have any right to come here and tell me how to raise my child or that I am a bad mother. If anyone is a bad parent that would be YOUR son who chose to leave and not bother to be around to help raise MY son. Now I would suggest that you back off and go back outside to enjoy the sunshine while I tend to my child in the way that I feel is necessary to raise him properly!" She turned on her heel and walked out the door... never again told me what to do with my child. And if I do say so myself.... even though we occasionally have our differences and yelling matches from time to time... he turned out pretty good! :o)
Shelagh you are so right - fortunately I never had any tantrums to put up with but they just knew that they could not ask for things in the shops etc and also knew that mum loved them - they only need to know three things :yes"means yes, and "no" means no, and I love you. End of story - no unruly kids !! God bless Gwen
Allaya, I'm sure whoever changed the subject line to "unruly kids" wasn't referring to *your* little one... just kids in general. :o)
Two is a difficult age for little ones... they are learning so much so fast, and want to know it all at once... sometimes it makes them think that they know better than adults. Personally I classify unruly kids as much older than two, who the parents have let rule the roost for far too long and now they find that they can't undo what has been done. Unfortunate for both the parents and the children.
Allaya - sorry I seem to have missed something here - I have not seen a mention of any two year old - just general unruly kids and it takes longer than two years to become what I would term "unruly".
By the way, I do recall when your little girl was a baby she had lots of troubles - I hope she is much better now - having not heard of her progress I have assumed that she recovered from her illnesses. God bless Gwen
I also think kids feel more secure knowing their parents are strong. The key is also to be loving, to make sure they know you're on their side. I also used to tell my kids, when they were older, of course, "It's my job to raise you so you'll be good citizens and useful members of society."
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