OT: I said yes to the demo (Prejudice)

Catherine,

I hope you have a good time doing the demo.

Are you sure she meant "I was expecting someone taller" as a negative thing? Maybe she just meant that she had formed a mental image of you which was different from reality.

Once I was working with a partner on a project for a class I was taking online. We started working on the project using email and instant messaging and got along really well (we often said the same thing at the same time). When we got together in person she said she immagined I would be thinner. I wasn't exactly delighted to hear that but I don't think she meant it that way :)

marisa2

csteele wrote:

Lol. What a weird thing to say. How did she know what to expect? I guess she just got a mental picture.

Good luck with your demo! I wish someone around here would do a polymer clay demo. I'd love to watch.

Did you speak with the shop owner over the phone before you met her? Sometimes people get a totally unjustified mental picture of a person from their voice. I wouldn't read too much into a single offhand remark like that, but I would watch for more. People do reveal their prejudices in their speech. I have an acquaintance from Chicago who often makes remarks like "You are pretty smart for someone from the South" or "The dentists here are so bad, no wonder Southerners have no teeth".

No, I'm not sure how she meant it however it struck something in me. I had no idea my height meant anything and to have it stand out at her, was new for me. I don't *think* it was meant to be negative it just surprised her that I would be so short. I forget how short I am compared to everyone else. This is the first time where my work preceded my personal introduction. She knew my work well before she met me. Interesting she would imagine me tall.....or imagine my height at all. I think we all do this......think of someone in a certain way and when we meet them it's completely different. It just shocked me, is all. I'm all nervous about this demo anyway. I just didn't need the short comment!

AH....I wouldn't appreciate the weight comment. I'm glad I didn't hear that one! I already bought a size bigger jeans this past month and I'm sensitive to weight comments. I'm not fat but getting fatter as I sit on my @ss all day making beads! Oh well, small (pun..HA) price to pay for my art I guess.

Catherine

That is what I was thinking!! How did she know what to expect?! Maybe someone as *talented* (her words...) as myself wouldn't be expected in a short person. Totally irrelevant!! Taller people get a different first impression than short people. Like large/fat people are perceived as dumb. Intelligence has nothing to do with weight, however I know this type of thinking is out there.

I probably judge people by their looks all the time. BAD, BAD, BAD! Human nature but still......very BAD!

Catherine

No, we only spoke in emails. I don't think she meant anything bad by it, but if it continues, that would just SUCK. I don't need that sort of person in my life! I have a hard enough time being "social" with nice people! (I've been out of school and the work force for 7 years and I'm totally out of the social stuff).

My husband has a prejudice about the south, and he is FROM the south. Go figure!

acquaintance

Catherine, I doubt she meant anything by it. I guess from working for so long and constantly hearing the same thing when I met people face to face, I got numbed to it. They always said, "I thought you would be a lot BIGGER." I'm 5'7" and until I quit working always wore a size 6 - about 116 lbs. I think I sound larger on the phone. Before I got used to the comments, I would really not appreciate it and say something like, "I was a lot bigger before the chemo, now I'm just glad to be alive!" That was fun.

You can practice saying things like, "I was, before the height reduction surgery. I'm happier this way." or something equally dumb. It really makes people reconsider offhanded comments!

Actually, you're right about the height thing. And it's a genetic sort of prejudice, that will probably always be with us. You know, the "big kids" and the adults are the ones in charge, the ones who teach us. No one ever talks about someone being a mini-might in their field. They speak of being a giant in their field. The speak of "someone I look up to".

People have to unprogram that as adults, and usually do. She's probably embarrassed that she said that, so don't let it bug you. All she really said is that your skill is big, so she expected you to be taller (her bad), not that there's anything wrong with being short.

We get discussions here regularly about prejudices. Against women, or large people, etc. When it comes right down to it, most of us have something people can prejudge us on. And the best way to eal with it is to be proud of it as a facet of our uniqueness; to think of it in positive terms.

I doubt if "taller people get paid more", but it wouldn't surprise me if they are given more leadership opportunities than shorter people. Unfortunate but true. And for that matter, it is applicable to all women.

Good luck on the demo. What have you gotten together so far to bring along?

I just put together a necklace with your blue roses. Each of three of your beads has bali bead caps and etched olive 6 mm druks on either side with 4mm olive Swarovski crystals between them. The necklace continues with 2 drucks, olive crystal, 2 druks, aqua crystal,..... Looks great. And the matching earrings are nice and light.

Tina

"someone I look up to", "a giant in their field"....Interesting...I had forgotten about these common phrases. Hummmmmmm....makes me think.

Here is a link to an article on height and income (it was on Yahoo! news awhile ago, and now I can't find it):

This was actually the firsttime I realized that being short can be a major disadvantage. Oh well!For the demo, I have about 375 round beads, 9 tile bracelet sets, 30 lentilpendants, and 30 heart pendants. AND I made a card couch to hold mybusiness cards!! That thing took me all day but it turned out really well,I think. necklace you made sounds really, really nice! I am going to make anecklace out of some of my beads to wear at the demo. The pendant I want isin the tumbler, so as soon as it's done, I'll work on the necklace. Catherine

<That is SOOOOOO awesome!!! Carol in SLC

WOW!!!!!!!!!!

Um, I had imagined something more modern. LOL! It is awesome. (I know what I'm going to be working on the next couple of days!)

Georgia

OMG!!!! That is BEAUTIFUL!!!! I love it!!! Such wonderful polymer clay work you do!

Marissa

That couch is delightful. And functional too.

Tina

love your card holder! Sarajane

Sarajane's Polymer Clay Gallery

That is astounding!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Beautiful!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Best of luck with the demo. I would love to see it.

The short comment is odd. I'm right there with you - all 5'2" of me. One time when I was teaching undergrad classes I had a huge class in one of those auditorium style classrooms (bleh). Some one who had been sitting in the back (i.e. the top) came down after class to ask me something. He was surprised I was short - but you see me everyday in person I said! I figured form the back of the room looking down I must REALLY look short and he just assumed it was visual thing and I had to be taller!

I may have to use the height reduction line. That's awesome!!!

Cool couch!!!!