Actually there was no whining or nastiness around here until Caryn decided to enter a thread in which a couple of people were joking around. It seems that one is not allowed to joke about Cleveland, it is Holy Ground and must not be the source of joking. That is who started the nastiness going - as usual.
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Or the person who only posts occasionally to begin with! It's all this stuff and the lack of any real stitching related topics that always makes me give up reading rctn for weeks and months at a time. I get why Caryn posted the original vent, as in days gone by, I suspect I posted my own vents from time to time. I get why Karen posts HER vents. What I don't get is why Karen has to "take over" a thread that was Caryn's to start with. All Caryn was doing was venting about the bad day. We've all had them. She wasn't comparing her day to anyone else's day. As has been said, none of us really can know what pain the other person may be feeling. My back hurts 24/7 but it's just something you learn to live with. Doesn't do me any good to complain about it because it's still gonna hurt tomorrow. I can sympathize with Caryn's having gone back to work after being a SAHM Mom and finding that being on your feet for 8 hours a day is HARD! I did the same thing (which is why I'm only reading very occasionally now) and found out my feet don't like me very well. And forget the knees.. they only communicate in pain. No nice words from them. But I'm not gonna bring it here because there's always gonna be someone who hurts worse, has done more, etc.
I'm rambling here, but my point is, if there is one, is that this is all so pointless, really. It's the same stuff, different day syndrome. One person posts about the bad day, then another has to top it.. then the fur starts flying...
"Can't we all just get along?"
Tegan
Said in another thread, and it certainly wasn't an open invitation for Karen to attack me in this thread over a vent about a bad day. Nor was your taking it across threads in any way good netiquette.
I've got just one more thing to add.....this is typical Sheena pot stirring. Come in, blame others for your own nastiness and/or lies and then pretend you are the one on the high road.
Caryn
Odd how jv pops up whenever Caryn feel that she's being pushed up against a wall. Whoever JV might be she/he never seems to have anything to say about needlework, but certainly comes through to defend her friends.
Who was it on Saturday Night Live that said: "Very interesting, but stupid?"
Lucille
What are Peak Freenes? Anything to do with chocolate?
Lucy
They're a company that makes wonderful English style tea biscuits and short bread cookies. Some of them do have chocolate. They're very good and I think are carried in many of the major supermarkets.
Lucille
Just as ugly as a cigaret in grown ups mouths and at least the pacifier doesn`t affevt people who don`t use it, mirjam
Thank you Dawne for understanding me so well ,,,, Like everybody else i met some people who weren`t up to the expected Good , so What ??? no reason at all to change my believing in Human goodness , and understand that some individuals are different. mirjam
I find the attitude you describe is what usually makes many peoples' fibromyalgia, (CFS or any other of the syndromes) ten times worse. Fibromyalgia is a psychosematic illness or syndrome. It is caused by stress factors, which can (and usually does) manifest in lack of delta sleep. Self pity is a huge part of many people's fatigue and unrest. There are people who actually thrive on being a victim. I have someone in my own life who does this. I cannot have a normal relationship with this person. It's one thing after the other after the other after the other.
Of course people with fibro will misinterpret what I just said into "fibro is in your head," which is not what I said. I HAVE it. In my case, it is caused by a chronic virus, low blood platelets, and a host of other stress factors on my body. I've lost almost 50 pounds to help with this and it sure has, but I still can't walk worth a damn.
What this has to do with what you were talking about is that, I find people who center the world around their own self are usually always victims. They thrive on it. No room to give anyone congratulations for anything.
"crewelwoman" wrote
A brand of cookies, and yes, there are some yummy chocolate varieties. Afternoon tea is improved greatly if there is a bag of Peek Freenes (aaaa, my spelling synapses have just shut down) present. Bourbon cremes are rectangular chocolate biscuits stuck together with chocoalte icing. Always got eaten first by my younger brother when I was a kid, leaving the boring old Digestive Biscuits for me. Dawne
Hi Victoria
Really sorry to hear you've had a relapse. :( Please ask Pat to keep me in the loop as you continue your treatment and get the results of your biopsy. I use your beautiful laying tools when ever I stitch. Good thoughts will be going your way as I use them.
{{hugs}}} Mavia
From me too!
Love
Pat
Can`t see that myself - Varyn and jv have a totally different style of writing.
Pat P
I think that is probably the saddest way to live. To be unable to empathize with others over both joys and sorrows, to be so wrapped up in your own self-pity that you can't even see that life has more to offer.
What a waste of a life that has to be.
I'm glad that I have the joy of watching my children grow up, to see them achieve at school, to watch them become women before my eyes (even if it terrified me that the older two needed homecoming dresses that were not prissy or prudish!). I'm happy that I can share in the joy of others over their happy dances, and hope for the best for people going thru things like biopsies (you are in my thoughts, Vic).
I'm happy that I can giggle along with my girls over the silly stuff in their lives. Even when I'm not feeling my best, I can still count on them to tell me something about their day that has us all laughing. I love that they can share even their fears with me, and know that they'll find a sympathetic ear and a warm hug. I'd miss all that if all I did was focus on my own aches, pains and worries over the future.
Sure I vent here, it's easier to vent to people who are more or less strangers than it is to your family. I don't want to burden them with some of my bigger fears, and having rctn as an outlet for venting has been a great help in my life.
Caryn
Arte Johnson on Laugh-In.
I find it intriguing that jv thinks the only way to give good wishes is by posting to the list. Maybe, just maybe, I take my comments to private e-mail, where I can offer to help, provide my address and phone number, etc., without shaming the whole list that they're not making the same offer to do something constructive instead of just cooing "poor baby"? Empty words. Sending something handmade is more meaningful. Listening to them cry at 3 AM is more meaningful. Offering them refuge in my guest room is more meaningful. Sending a "thinking of you" note several months after the death in the family when everyone else has forgotten that they're hurting is more meaningful.
But, like everything else I do, because it's not trumpeted on the list, that means I'm not doing it, because jv knows that if she were doing something like that, she'd want the whole world to know what a wonderful, thoughtful person she is.
As for the other comment, my friend took it as the joke it was intended to be, because we'd had many laughs privately about why I even bothered to try stitching while medicated, when I knew everything had to be frogged the next day.
Since you're so concerned about what people do to help the afflicted, did *you* spend the money to send her a get well card when that was suggested, jv? Or did you take the cheapskate route and send her only a free greeting through the list? I went the step beyond a $2 card and sent her a get well present because we're good friends off-list. But I didn't make that announcement to the list, and neither did she, so you figure I've been sitting around for the past two months doing nothing, instead of cheering her up out of the public eye. Why don't you ask her what I've done for her that you don't know about? You might be surprised how much I do for people that you don't know about because we don't talk about it publicly.
I DARE you to ask on lists what I have done for people that is more constructive than just typing "I'm sorry". I know you won't, because you don't want to hear that I'm not the spoiled, selfish person you think I am. You definitely don't want to post a comment to my blog asking that question: you'd hear much too much that you don't want to hear about acts of charity that the recipient still remembers years later, handmade gifts that have become family heirlooms, offers to charter a plane to get someone home in time to see a dying relative.... In fact, if you read the comments posted to my blog in the last week or so, you'll get plenty of information about what sort of person I am behind the scenes, contradicting your and Caryn's impressions that it's all about me.
Obvioiusly dearest, you know nothing about me or who I am. I will tell you this, however, most of what I do for a living and on the side is not spoken about on any of the stitching lists that I belong to because I don't need anyone's public acknowledgement. I sleep very well at night because I know I'm living my life to the best of my ability and leaving it in a better way than I found it.
Actually, not that you need to know about it, but when said mutual friend was having a tough time, she's had several private emails and hand-written "thinking of you" notes from me (rather than a $2 card... much more personal!), along with a handmade gift that was something I knew she'd appreciate.
And in response to your dare; I *have* asked people about you, and I don't get raves about what a wonderful person you are. Generally, the answers are that all people know of you is from your posts to the groups - and "she seems ok". One friend who used to defend you because all she knew of you was your posting here changed her tune very quickly after she became involved in another group you were involved in. I see I've hit a nerve, though, you certainly responed with enough vitriole!
Karen C - California wrote:
Who's against a wall? As always, I can and do speak for myself. I don't mind that I share some opinions with Dilli, just as I'm sure you like it when people agree with you as well. I didn't expect to hear from her, to be honest, I know she's been pretty busy in her own life lately.
BTW, Dilli has actually commented on stitching threads, just Google her and see.
Caryn (standing her ground firmly in the middle of the room, back well away from any walls)
And you are too busy giggling to see that someone else does not have this option, is not as fortunate ?
So why is it that Karen is supposed to not vent here because Caryn doesn't want to be bothered seeing it. Is there some rule that says Caryn may vent because she must protect her family from it, but Karen who has nobody else in the house must not do so. What warped thinking!
Dilli, because you have shared things about your private life with me privately, I will respect that and not share them here. However, I must say that you give more of your life and energy to helping others than anybody else I've ever met in my whole life. You are no saint, that's for sure, you totally have a bitchy side. I find it funny, others don't. Such is life.
To see you accused of being petty and (apparently) cheap to boot just showed me much others project their own motives and actions onto others.
Caryn
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