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I have perfected a top that never stops spinning.

Afters years of research and development I would like to announce the I have succeded in perfecting a true perpetual motion machine. Now those of you who are more familiar with my artistic side might be reluctant to believe this scientific marvel but it's true. I have been blessed with equally powerful left and right hemispheres of my brain. So this means that in addition to having an eye for perfect forms I am also able to work out comlicated mathematical equations in my head.These gifts culminated in the development of this awesome machine.My first prototype has been powering a 40W light bulb in my shop for six months now and shows no signs of slowing down.All from a single flick of these talented fingers.My second generation "PMT" will go on line soon and will free me of dependence on the bigamist controlled utility company to power my trailer.

I have been approached by the military,NASA,and a foriegn government of dubious character(read Canardians)all seeking the secret to this gift from God.I have rebuked them all.I saw what they did with the power of the atom.I'm not letting them get thier hands on this baby. Do I look stupid? Anyway I have decided to direct the use of this awesome technology myself.Imagine the possibilities.Arrid lands made green and fertile.Oceans desalinated for potable water.Hunger eliminated from the face of the earth and millions saved from certain starvation and death.

All I need is a few investors.I must improve my facilities to continue my work on the scale necessary to reach accomplish my goals.If you are interested in this wonderful opprotunity please contact me in private and I will be glad to discuss with you how you can help mankind and provide security for your familys future.

God Bless, Al Kyder

Reply to
Al Kyder
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Sorry, Al--you are a little late. I have already invented this. In fact, I can go you one better. My top not only keeps on spinning, it is so efficient that it keeps speeding up, to the point that it sets fire to itself and whatever surface it happens to be spinning on. I realize now, after reading your post, that the answer is to add windings to the top so it can generate electricity, thereby increasing its usefulness, and allowing me to limit its speed. I will agree not to sue you if you will let me use this idea.

Reply to
Leo Lichtman

You're both way behind the 8-ball on this. I've created a perpetual motion machine that generates enough energy to facilitate cold fusion. I'm powering the entire neighborhood with a small wooden top spinning at roughly

60K rpm and a couple of beakers of liquid. Story at 11.

Max

Reply to
Maxprop

******************************** Al, How's the climate there in Nigeria?
Reply to
Ken Moon

Gee guys, I hadn't thought of using a top for power. I've perfected cold fusion using green fruit woods and Costco liquid dish detergent (LDD) in a 5 gallon pail on my back porch.

Jim

Maxpr>

Reply to
Jim Swank

And one more testimonial for LDD. Its uses are myriad!

Reply to
Leif Thorvaldson

I wash my dishes with it. Has anyone thought of that??

Max

Reply to
Maxprop

Leif Thorvaldson wrote: And one more testimonial for LDD. Its uses are myriad! ^^^^^^^^^^^ Myriad: the opposite of single, or unmyriad.

Reply to
Leo Lichtman

You guys are missing the message that Al is trying to send. He IS the TOP that he refers to.

He never stops spinning his tales. All that needs to happen is that he goes on the Fox Channel with Bill O'Reilly. Only then will he stop spinning.

Reply to
Jamrelliot

Dang! It's uses just keep on being discovered. It's uncanny. I recall reading in one of those alien news groups a few years back that we got transisters from the Roswell crash. I'm beginning to suspect that maybe it was those little grey guys w/the big eyes that brought use LDD too. Hey Leif, have you been visited by the Men in Black yet?

Down right eerie...

...Kevin

Reply to
Kevin & Theresa Miller

Very punny Leo.

_____ American Association of Woodturners Cascade Woodturners Assoc., Portland, Oregon Northwest Woodturners, Tigard, Oregon _____

Reply to
Owen Lowe

..........and I've got a bottle of JD that never runs dry.....................Barry

Reply to
Barry N. Turner

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