UPDATE: Firehouse Angel

Victoria and I have exchanged numerous e-mails over the last few months. Half the time she wanted absolutely *nothing* to do with the whole project. The other half she wanted me to have EVERYTHING sent back to her ASAP so that she could finish the Angel herself and as she saw fit. VBS, in my last e-mail, I told her that there were new volunteers who were very excited about finally having a chance to work on the Angel. I said that I would not ask this of the group -- that too many had poured heart and soul into the project to just send it back unfinished and forget about it. I also told her that several people have voiced concern to me about returning the Angel to her and then having her get "too busy" again to have it framed and presented. As a result, she was most upset with me. I am sure this is why she asked Dianne to remove her name from the website and I am sorry about that. She put me between a rock and a hard place -- she being BOTH of those -- and I felt that she needed to hear what I told her. I don't handle being manipulated too well and that's what I felt was being done to me. I am sure she doesn't feel that she had put me in an untenable position but that's the way I felt and still feel! I told her I was ready to send her the money to cover whatever expenses she had incurred and she sent me an itemized list of her expenses. I do believe that I shall just send her some $$ and be done with it! I will apologize to one and all -- volunteers AND the general folks here for putting all of you through this. I honestly think that Victoria really and truly felt the project would be finished within the a year and ready for presentation on 9/11/04! Everything would be just peachy keen with absolutely NO problems or clashes of personalities, etc. VBS -- well, as we all know, that is NOT what happened. I honestly apologize if I have done anything to make matters worse. I have been known to do that :-). Anyway, I STILL think that Victoria's name should be with the info about the Angel when it is presented to the FDNY HQ. It was her wonderful idea and she DID provide most of the supplies and she deserves recognition for all of that. She also deserves to have her scroll frame back and I will make sure that she receives it as it was a cherished gift to her from a dear friend. She had provided a laminated copy of the original chart and a laminated replacement (the original one is MIA) is being sent to her sometime next week. A new chart is being sent to Linda T., the next stitcher as you REALLY need to have the original to get all of the colors right. Hopefully, this will be the last unpleasant post on this particular aspect of the whole project that I make. I am sure each of us has a different opinion of what has gone on but right now, I am mostly concerned with the project as it stands at this time and hope not to dwell on the difficulties that have been encountered up to this point. CiaoMeow >^;;^<

Although I mostly lurk here and have not stitched on the angel, I have watched this project with great interest since the beginning.

First: Tia Mary, you have absolutely nothing to apologize for. You have been the voice of reason and tact throughout the entire episode. Thank you.

Second: I worry about Victoria. She seems very fragile and easily bruised, taking offense where none was intended. She started this lovely project with high hopes but life does tend to interfere and Victoria doesn't seem to be able to cope. I do believe her name should be included on the final presentation documentation because if it weren't for Victoria the piece would not exist.

Third: Thank you, Dianne, for keeping the web site up to date for all of us. It is a lot of work and I, for one, truly appreciate your efforts.

My 2 cents

Crewelwoman

I have left that information on the "site" and it will remain there. I'll make sure that it is noted that she provided the supplies to get us all going. I hope Victoria has some time to ponder what has been happening the last week or so, and that she will again be with this project.

For everyone else: Just focus on the "angel" and everything else will fall into place. If you read this page in its entirety:

I definitely agree with you on this, Tia Mary. I'm going to say this publicly (and don my flameproof suit!): It's really too bad (not to mention just Not Nice) that she put you in this position....it is *she* who should apologize to all of us! Although, even if she still does read the ng (which she says she doesn't), we'll never have a snowball's chance in Hades of seeing one. :)

Again, definitely! And keep up the great work you're doing with it! :)

Joan

Thank you, but it really is very little effort on my part. I have to put the latest pictures up. I taught an EGA class near Milwaukee yesterday and had my hands full getting it ready along with kits. Now I can focus on some other things. :-) Dianne

that's too bad that Victoria wants nothing more to do with this project; she was truly blessed to have so many people willing to help her with this project. maybe with time and distance she'll come to realize that.

I admire the work that all of you have done on this project to honor the 343 who perished on that awful day. The Firehouse Angel is stunning!

Lisa

I'm sorry you've had to deal with all of this. I know that it can't have been easy and I thank you for the way you've handled it. I'm sorry that Victoria no longer wants anything to do with the project. I don't think that's right. I know that I was one of the sources of tension, but it never really occurred to me that she'd leave over it. I think that she truly felt a sense of ownership and didn't understand the extent to which the Angel has come to belong to all of us. I'm sorry about that.

Tia Mary, thank you so much for the role you've played in organizing and protecting this project. I mailed her on to Linda T. yesterday and I look forward to getting her back to bead when the stitching is done. If you need money for Victoria or for framing, please let me know. If Victoria wants to be reimbursed, you should not have to do that yourself. And even if she is reimbursed, I don't think we can remove her name from the project. It wouldn't be right.

Elizabeth

I lurk, and no, I want no recognition for it, I want my name withdrawn from it all, no mention of me, not on the finished project, not my email address on the website, not my name as chair or anything else. Really, I don't. If, for the sake of the origination, use the same story, but in place of my name, use "Anonymous." Someone anonymously from New York. Really, Really, Really. I'm not angry, or hateful, or upset. I'm just finished. There is a difference.

I am sorry for everything. I apologize for it all. My deepest sorry. To be perfectly honest, if I didn't do it as a round robin I had full intentions of doing it myself and donating it anonymously, as I have done with other projects, MANY times in the past. I have absolutely no need to be mentioned. I DO have a say over that and I'm saying it here so everyone can see it and I don't put anyone in the hard place.

Remove all traces of me from the website and the project, period. Pretty please with a cherry on top.

As for being worried about me, as someone said, please don't. I am perfectly stable, have an awesome life and I could not be happier. You know nothing of me. Only how I communicate here, which is sorely lacking and I am not skillful at it, admittedly. I have no ambivalence to those who feel I'm some poor, sensitive thing.

I never asked Tia Mary for money, she offered it and I told her how much it all cost, and not even all of it. I never told her to tell anyone this, nor did I insist anyone pay me. She said she'd be glad to pay me for it and be done with it all. I can give the quote if anyone wants to see it. I simply said I didn't think spending 500 dollars to frame it was what I wanted for the piece, and that when it was finished being stitched to send it to me and I would frame it. I was then accused of never doing it, finding other things to keep me busy, stranding everyone, which I would NEVER do regardless what the situation was. I was appauled to be accused of such a thing, after all these years being here. That's when I reminded her of who paid for everything but the fabric and some fibers. Why would I steal something like that. Holy cow.

I hope this clears everything up. I don't want emails, or poor victoria remarks, don't waste the energy. I'm fine. Geesh.

Okay, all? I apologized, I'm sorry, whatever else I wish everyone good life, health and happiness in all you do. I mean that.

Take care, Victoria

I usually lurk and keep out of discussions like this. But I did stitch on the angel and feel I need to say this.

Regardless of how and why Victoria feels she needs to be removed from this project, I don't feel that should be done. You cannot rewrite history, and she was the one who had the original inspiration to do this piece. Her information can be kept to a minimum, but should not be removed altogether. She provided the impetus for all of us to partake in this wonderful project, and despite all that has happened, I truly think it is a wonderful project. It was begun with the best of intentions from all of us and should be ended the same way.

Pat in NJ PS - Sorry for the top post, but my computer seems determined to do that.

Thank you for your imput, but this is not up to you or the stitchers of the project. It's up to me. I have fully removed myself from all aspects of this project. Actually, I was told it was NOT my project, but that of everyone who took part. So, I really don't mind you discussing it, but it's really up to me how or where my name is used. Please don't try to take away my ability to have control of my own name and how or if it's used.

I would truly appreciate my name to be removed. Replace it with "An>I usually lurk and keep out of discussions like this. But I did stitch on

I can't do that, as that would be rewriting history. And, I think you would agree that isn't the proper thing to do. It's a falsehood. It goes against my principles to perpetrate a falsehood. It was a conversation between you and Tia Mary that got this project off the ground. Without this conversation, the Angel wouldn't be where she is today.

Immediately after your email to me I removed your email from the site. If you would prefer "Anonymous", then you'll have to wait until I can reword the piece.

This is all very strange and I really feel badly about it.

Dianne

Bourne Identity wrote:

Sorry you`re only lurking, Victoria, I shall miss you. After all, we started off on here bashing away at each other unmercifully, and eventually became really good friends!

Good luck and take care of yourself.

Pat P

I'll add my sentiments to that Vic. Stay in touch.