OT: Home Schooling

I should have told you that, this condo does a summer bbq down at the party room, plus a Christmas party. I figure the next power outage, I am going to start a lobby party. Last one, everyone seemed to congregate in the lobby and chat and if I hadn't had a headache that day, I would have trucked along some wine to get it going. They also play cards in the party room on Tuesday and Wednesday nights, that's nice as there are some people who no longer get out easily, but they can handle that.

I have talked with other condo owners in other buildings, and the above is not too common.

Ah yes...the perks of condo living in the right condo complex :) My parents moved into a condo last September. My Dad has had a great deal of difficulty with the change, but my Mom loves it. She can get their mail without going out in the weather, has a girlfriend to have tea with right in her building, the weekly Stitch and Gab is across the cul de sac from their building, there is also an Afternoon Tea held every Wednesday afternoon. The guys enjoy games of pool, and Bridge is for men and women, plus they have access to a fitness room. In addition to all this they have Potluck Dinners for all the holidays, as well as Summer BBQ's. The gardens of the complex are beautiful and Mom and Dad don't have to lift a finger to keep them nice.

OTOH, our neighbourhood is a very diverse mix, some of us have lived here for 20+ years, others are new to the neighbourhood. I think what makes it most difficult to meet each other is it is a very busy street...not a cul de sac or quiet community type area. We had friends who lived in a neighbourhood where they had a Potluck in the summer and a BBQ in the winter, but it was all held outside in someone's driveway. Our area isn't suited to that at all, we would all have to watch the little ones like hawks, so they didn't get hit by a car.

Anyway, for our neighbourhood it just doesn't happen, and throw into that the fact my DH works straight graveyard shift, which means we have only Friday and Saturday nights to do anything with anyone. I work 3 out of 4 weekends, so it makes it pretty tough to have much of a social life. I look forward to retiring to a nice condo where we can enjoy our neighbours and activities.

take care, Linda

For the life of me, I cannot understand why a group of people would conscript the phrase "it takes a village" and use it to mean the opposite of what it means. How can you possibly be a proponent of the idea and not want/expect other people to "pinch hit"? I'm terribly confused about this. The very phrase "it takes a village" means everyone has to be a part of the social order (do we even have social order, anymore, what with road rage, airplane rage, everyday foul language even in the workplace, etc?).

Dianne

Whoa. An agenda is sort of like a conspiracy. You lose me with those words. :-)

-- i.e., you may not have a problem with what I don't want my

Couldn't agree more. Especially if we are talking about usual, customary bad behavior (stealing, swearing, tearing up my flowers, throwing pop cans on my lawn, etc.) I would hope that the child's parents would back up my scolding in these incidences.

I don't think your example was extreme. :-) But I'm still not sure we are understanding one another. Have another crumpet. Put some of that blackberry jam on it. More tea? I really need to make another cosy. Mine is shot. I'm too lazy. It just seems like too much trouble. Everything I think of doing seems like a mountain. So, I'm glad for this conversation. It's diverting my attention in a positive way.

Dianne

I would not have liked it when I was younger, maybe not even ten years ago, but it's right now. I did all the labouring like garbage, mowing, snow removal since the mid 70s and a couple of years ago after chainsawing four fallen trees after the hurricane, then slowly digging myself to the road after the Great Blizzard, I knew I wanted to retire from all that, so here I am !

A busy road certainly doesn't lend itself to group activities. When we lived in downtown Halifax our road was quiet after the afternoon commute and people sat out on the porches and that was how I met most of them. Porch hopping was great fun. I don't like neighbours round my neck but I do enjoy knowing who my neighbours are.

Dianne Lewandowski wrote in news: snipped-for-privacy@individual.net:

I dunno, but around here it seems to be that the government tends to consdier itself to be the village that you need in order to raise your child and that you, the parent, can't do it. If they would give parents the benefit of the doubt, it wouldn't be so bad.

Like I said, though, I think and at least hope it is just this school district who feels that parents are incompetent to raise their own children and who have gotten on the parents' back about not doing things like, for one example, going to the nearest major city to participate in a candlelight vigil for starving children -- the flyer talking about it said something like, "I was really disappointed in the turnout from our school this year. Next year you need to clear your calendars and make it a priority," or something to that effect -- and are not even thinking about the fact that different families will have different priorities and that those different priorities need to be accepted. And just because some parents abdicate their responsibility of raising their children to the schools doesn't mean that the schools need to take over for those who are doing perfectly well.

Dianne Lewandowski wrote in news: snipped-for-privacy@individual.net:

Well, at least I am *extremely* encouraged that the "it takes a village" thing doesn't mean that "it takes a village because you are an incompetent lunkhead and only the village knows how to do this." Honest, you don't know *how* glad I am to know that there are people who don't interpret it that way.

And I know what you mean about everything seeming like a mountain. I have my own projects that should be easy enough to do but right now I'm so busy that I can't even think of starting them, because I don't have any chunks of time big enough to get them started in that would be worth doing anything on.

And this school district uses the phrase, "It takes a village . . ."? I think the school district is "part" of the "village".

I remember when my daughter was in second grade and they were putting on a play and a costume was required. This costume was expensive. I went to the teacher and said it was unfair to ask people of little means to contribute large dollars for a 2nd grade drama. Surely there must be another way around the situation. This teacher wasn't happy, but I stood my ground.

So, I think sometimes teachers and districts get big ideas and that's why parents need to step up to the plate and keep them level headed. I imagine it's an ongoing vigil. I fought against mandatory dental and physical exams as well. Not because I didn't care about my daughter. Not that she didn't get adequate health/dental care. But it came about when necessary, not when the state/district mandated it. I told them: when you pay the bill, you can demand when.

So, anyway, I hear your frustration. If your local government is using the phrase "it takes a village", then they are misusing it. And, it should be pointed out to them . . . maybe in a letter to the editor of the local press.

Dianne

Stitcher wrote: But having at least one annual event where we all get

A few years ago, we had the First Annual Christmas Progressive Party. There hasn't been a Second Annual; she couldn't get up enough interest among those she talked to. The curiosity factor of seeing the inside of the houses, how each has been remodeled, was satisfied, and we've found we have very little in common other than location.

The discussion is very interesting , but the most interesting phrase i found here

So this people believe that the government does influence the children`d minds in a certain way remoniscent of the communists , taking into account that many of the Homeschoolers in Usa , do so because of religious or other ideological reasons , i.e, wanting to teach ceratim values or `deffend` the children from `being exposed` to certain facts . Aren`t this just those Home schoolers who are reminiscent of what you accused the communists of. You may speak badly about the educational systems of Certain socialistic groups. But this is a very unfair remark, beside ideological parts, the socialistic education, was the right thing at the time it was implimented. It has managed to take great groups of people who got almost no education, and teach them everything, from reading /writing to proffessions,. East Europe affter WW2 was ruined and the Socialist Educational systems helped to build up some much needed schooling systems. And teaching some local and national pride was part of it. Like everything else in life the problem are in the amount of everything. The Capitalist system has it`s own methods to influence kids` future ideaology.

So who needs Driving liscences , you pay for the car ,,,, When in need of operation , you will decide where and what to cut. You just agreed above to the 'It takes a village... statement .... But you want to have it your way ,,,,, But what if your neighbour does agree. Let`s say you teach your kids that wearing red is sinful , but your neighbour worships red......How are you going to live together ??? Should societies have some Common lines ??? How to impliment them , if not by commonly agreed education systems,

... >

All the above is wonderful if you are llucky enough and can affford it . but if your salary is so low ,,,that both of the parents have towork for their basic daily needs???? Can we than Hint that the governments are part of the low economical situation, that doesnt enable those parents to function like you do.

If you Don`t have a problem with a stranger reprimanding a kid , why not let a teacher give your kids some added info and ideas , that are different than yours.?

By the way , how are your kids going to learn to respect other religions , races , ideologies ? haven`y you deprived them of the ability to meet learn and understand that people might differ in all the above but still are equal ? One of the ways i advanced the understanding and acceptance of fiberart , was by joining a group of `conventional ` artists , Who learned by working side by side , that Fiberart is just like their art only with different tools and materials .

HUMMM?? You Don`t allow `the Government` tell you how and what to teach your kids , but you think that you are the judge for other people`s deeds , and than you Tell them they are wrong ..... And who are you exactly to decide that others do wrong ??? And why do you think that YOUR way is better,,, Thus in your own method, i think i should tell you , that your homeschooling is an effort to controll your kids minds , And as i stated above , it is You not the goverment who is Brainwashing your kids minds. you are Stopping them , from the possibbility to compare your ideas with other ideas. You will never know if they really belive in your ideas , since they haven`t been able to compare it and really test their understanding and `belief`. mirjam

These days, the mindset seems to be "do unto others before they have a chance to do unto you".

One of the neighbors thinks that it's OK to throw loud outdoor parties with heavy metal bands as long as she invites everyone within earshot. The Noise Law that takes effect at 11 PM applies to everyone but her.

Another neighbor also thinks that it's OK to do whatever she wants, whenever she wants, and to use my yard as a garbage dump. The illegal dumping law doesn't apply to her. When the electric company came out to remove her vines from their wires, even after they told her this was a safety hazard, she threatened to sue them if they even touched her vines. The "control your plants" law doesn't apply to her, either. These happen to be the vines that I'm allergic to, that she refuses to take out (or keep on her side of the fence) because *she* likes them. If they make me sick, too bad; that's my problem, not hers.

Yet another neighbor started off on the wrong foot as soon as they moved in by sending a letter that they were going to replace the fence, and demanding everyone who shares a property line with them owes them a share of the cost. When I told them I am waiting to be approved for disability benefits and didn't have that kind of money just now, they threatened to sue. That's a long way from the neighborhood I grew up in, where the disabled folks were looked after and helped out. They also believe that the law against excessive barking applies to everyone's dogs but theirs, and said some unprintable things when they were asked politely to keep the dogs quiet at night so the rest of us can sleep.

One of the apartment complexes we lived in, the management thought it would be nice to throw a Meet Your Neighbors barbecue. Barely anyone showed up, and many of those who did, came in, grabbed their free burger, and took it home to eat where they wouldn't have to talk to anyone else! I was there for an hour, and couldn't get a conversation started with anyone.

Melinda ? why complicate this beautiful Human coception I come from a total different culture and place , and Everybody o know here understood that Hillary Clinton meant ,, that ALL of Us the whole Human race are responsible Together and seprately , to ensure a Better future for ALL the kids in the world !!!! as if we were a small village !!! I always felt that she had in mind the Good of all kids, Just like the BILL OF CHILD Rights as published by UNICEF years ago.

snipped-for-privacy@actcom.co.il (Mirjam Bruck-Cohen) wrote in news: snipped-for-privacy@ar.news.verio.net:

No, I didn't speak badly about their educational system. I just am a strong believer that education is not about social indoctrination and that social indoctrination should never be the primary responsibility of the government. That is my own personal belief.

I am not complaining about their educational systems. I am complaining about a government who feels that the children belong to the government more than to the parents who gave birth to the child and who, for the most part, foot the bill for raising the child.

Driver's licenses are not a function of raising a child. Some examples of what should be the province of a parent are deciding what TV shows, music, movies, video games, etc., the child is permitted to watch, what clothes they are permitted to wear, etc.

What I tell my children about people who have conflicting beliefs/convictions/whatever than we do is that we don't agree with everything they do, and they undoubtedly do not agree with everything we do, but if we want our beliefs and choices respected by them, we have to respect their right to make their own choices and live by their own beliefs, and there is room in the country for everybody.

This is in direct opposition to those who want minority opinions, lifestyles, etc. quashed, especially ones that have been held by a majority of people for a majority of history.

It's not a matter of affording it. It's a matter of making it a priority. And any parent, whether they work full-time or not, whether their child is in public, private, or home school, can take the time to raise their child properly -- if they want to.

It doesn't take money to train your child properly. It takes time and putting your child first at times to make sure they are raised properly.

The difference is that the kid throwing the pop bottle on the sidewalk is not only breaking the law, but they are creating a potentially dangerous situation. Traditionally, cardinal rule #1 of tattling is that it's okay to tattle if you are tattling to prevent a dangerous, unlawful, or unsafe situation -- and that rule also applies to correcting someone else when they are doing something hazardous in my book.

That does not apply when I train my child a certain way and the school wants to undermine my authority as a parent. *That* is a totally different thing, and you can't compare the two.

How did I deprive them? We get out in the work. We do volunteer work together. We live in a diverse neighborhood. We get to know our mail carrier, the checkers at the grocery store, etc. My children are meeting a far wider variety of people in real life than they would in the local public school, and they are learning better models of how to treat other people than the neighborhood vermin would give them if they were warehoused with them 30 hours a week.

I am strictly referring to breaking the law or doing something hazardous. For example, when I see kids who ought to be old enough to know better run their hands through the bulk food bins at the grocery store (a health/safety hazard), or picking grapes off the bunches and eating them (something unlawful), or whatever, I ask them something like, "Do you really think you ought to be doing that?" Or when I see them acting like hooligans with no parent in sight, I ask them where their parent is. So it's not matters where I have to decide if it's right or wrong, it's matters where right and wrong have already been decided.

Well, you don't know exactly what I have done in 22 years of raising children well enough to make that statement, but if it makes you feel better to believe it, be my guest.

snipped-for-privacy@actcom.co.il (Mirjam Bruck-Cohen) wrote in news:428eb7f3.5704548 @ar.news.verio.net:

I was just referring to how it gets interpreted in my neck of the woods.

If you held a minority religion in a country where there was only one national religion, would you agree with your children being indoctrinated in that religion and being told that all others were wrong?

If you were a vegetarian and were raising your children as vegetarians because you were honestly convicted that eating meat was unhealthy and something that nobody should do, would you want your child taught about meat products and given meat products to eat regularly so that they coudl evaluate for themselves whether being a vegetarian was a good thing or not?

Neither of these issues are "right or wrong" issues in themselves as much as they are personal choices that people make for themselves, and as much as they may be personally convinced that their choice is the right choice, they have to acknowledge that not everybody will feel the same. And in these types of issues where there are legitimate variances of opinion, I feel that the government has no right to impose their beliefs on those of minority views unless it causes a safety or security hazard, and that if the government is going to educate children about, for example, meat, they also ought to acknowledge that there are lots of people who are vegetarians for reasonable reasons and they also ought to allow those children who are vegetarians by their own or their parents' choices to continue to be vegetarians without a problem.

That bill of children's rights is okay for an oppressed country, but it also contains things that prevent parents from raising their children the way they feel that they ought to.

The way I look at things is that the government did not give me this child and they are not ultimately responsible for it, and just the same as the old saying, "where government money goes, government control follows," I feel that if I am footing the bill to raise my child, the government has no right to tell me how to raise them. And certainly the government has given people on welfare as much latitude as possible in how they use their welfare money that they certainly ought to be consistent and allow me the same latitude in raising my own children.

Someone came up with the notion that our elementary school band needed "uniforms" -- white blouse/shirt with navy skirt/slacks wasn't good enough any more. That same someone came up with the notion that every band member's mother had to sew one for each kid she had in band. There were kids who didn't have mothers. There were kids whose single mothers had two jobs and no time. There were kids whose mothers didn't have sewing machines. There were kids whose mothers shouldn't have been allowed anywhere near a sewing machine. None of that mattered. My SAHM and GM, who loved to sew, would've gladly made a dozen, and done them right. Instead, we had trim that meandered all over, hems that were two inches higher in spots, a couple with the letters attached in the wrong order, some with the letters and trim glued on.... I was, frankly, embarrassed to wear the one I was issued the next year, so Mom and I pulled it apart and re-did it to look less like something slapped together in five minutes by a chimpanzee.

While it may be "fair" to ask parents to make the number of uniforms needed by their own kids, it didn't take into consideration that not every family has the time or talent for the project. It would have been much better to have some arrangement like "we need 40 uniforms and 120 bake sale items", and let the parents work out for themselves that my mom would make a dozen uniforms, leaving 11 non-sewing parents to provide several bake sale items each.